Help! Just been told my 13yr old has Aspergers syndrome and Anorexia

[jamiesmom]

Hi my 13 yr old dd has just been diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome as well as having anorexia Not been told anything much apart from doctor's trying to get her into a clinic in London for the anorexia and i've got to go to a parents help class in sept for the aspergers syndrome. Can anyone give me any advise on either problem please as i'm at my wits end right now. Thanks

Jm ~ so sorry to hear this. Must be such a shock I know that they can be linked.
I have some info on Aspergers here www.autism.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=1245&a=2621
Please carry on posting. I am sure there will be lots of others that can help/support you.

Lots of articles here on how 2 conditions are linked www.google.com/search?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&rls=ADBS,ADBS:2006-49,ADBS:en&q=aspergers+and+anor exia HTH

My 2 boys are younger than your dd (7yrs & 4yrs with AS/ASD) but I'd be happy to help with the AS side of things if I can.

Sorry to hear this. I had anorexia when I was a teen so if you've any questions I might be able to answer.

Blossomhill I'll take a look at the web sites this morning when Jades not around, Thanks.

Coppertop I'm not realy sure what i'm up against with the ASD so any advise would be great, Thanks. I just used to think she was being difficult & only found out about the ASD after she started hurting me, she used to hit, punch, kick, pull my hair. Mainly in the morning before school as she was getting bullied, I used to be black & blue most the time. So i took her to my GP who got her a appointment with CAMHS. Then in Jan this year she turned her hair straigtners on & put them on her arm, luckily my 15yr DS walked in on her, turned them off & got me.

needmorecoffee I weighed Jade again last night & she's lost another 4 lbs in 5days (I have to weigh her every 5 days & put it in a diary along with everything she eats, which she hates) how can you lose 4lb in 5 days when you are only 5st 8lb to start with???? It broke my heart but i try'd not to show it & said something realy lame like "oh thats not to bad, you've only lost a bit" Something to do with her only eating 2 tiny bites of a sandwich & 1 nibble of a piece of pizza Friday i'll bet! How can i get her to eat without upseting her? My ex husband said we've got to force feed her I think that'll make matters worse! He'd sit her down and ram the food down her throat if he had his way I've told her I'll get her the new clothes she's after if she manages to eat 1/2 of every meal (i'm giving her smaller meals now) & it seamed to be working cos from 18th - 27th sept she only lost 1lb then in the last 5 day she loses 4lb Any advise would be realy great as i don't no if i'm doing the right thing in not making a big issue of it infront of her.

You really nedd expert help with the Anorexia. I have two DSs diagnosed with Aspergers-one is 8, the other 18.
The 8 year old has a lot of issues around food-getting him to eat is really difficult, and at times of stress it becomes much worse.
How long is it likely to take for the doctor to get your DD into the clinic?

The doctor said its realy hard to get beds at this clinic as they are in high demand and it takes at least 4 long hard months to help the girls in there so i think it could be a long wait. I really don't want her to go into the clinic as she is really shy & i can't imagine her not being at home with me. (thats me being selfish tho is'nt it?) I don't no how i'll cope with getting to see her either as i don't drive and its a bit of a treck to london & back with a 3yr old in toe

You need urgent help if she's not much over 5 stone and I don't hold with pussy-footing around anorexics. By promising her clothes if she eats 2 bites its like making her her anorexia the centre of attention. The only thing that cured me was seeing my mother break down in tears cos she thought I was going to die and have a doctor spell out exactly what could happen with regards to heart attacks.
Anorexics are extemely selfish. Its very hrd to explain but I think the only thing that works is making them eat in a residential clinic and counselling. Then they can't vomit it up and they are forced to sit and eat each meal. Force feeding at home rarely works.
But getting the correct help is a bloody nightmare. Will your GP section her under the mental health act? It sounds horrible but the anorexia is like a monster than has taken over your daughter and her body must be fed while this monster is destroyed. The extreme low weight does bizarre things to the mind too so she's not really in her right mind either.
My heart really goes out to you. Would it help your daughter to talk to an ex-anorexic?
Also, don't let her near the internet with those pro-ana sites. They are poisonous.

hi needmorecoffee thanks for your advise. the clothes were for eating at least 1/2 of each meal i gave her (breakfast, lunch & dinner), which she was doing but has now stopped. She was really strugeling to eat some days tho, taking small bites and taking nearly an hour to eat a meal.
The doctor she is under is from Birmingham childrens hospital and works for CAMHS (child and adolescent mental health service) I think he is going to force her to go into the clinic, which although i really don't want her to go there i know its what is needed and is the best thing for her. She is all to awear of what will happen to her if she carries on not eating as a friends sister of mine has recently died from anorexia, all her organs shut down and eventualy her skin came away from her body, i have drumed this into jade over the last few weeks but all i get is "well thats not going to happen to me cos i eat"
I don't think she would talk to an ex-anorexic as at the moment she's saying there is nothing wrong with her and she eats loads, (which i no she isn't). As for the web sites it's too late for that as thats how i realised something was wrong as she was reserching anorexia and bulimia a few months back, which i put a stop to straight away.
My next appointment with DR.Loh is Monday afternoon and i'm expecting him to get her a bed in the clinic asap when he see's how much weight she's lost again.