Had a sad moment yesterday.

[eidsvold]

Was dropping dd1 off at kindy and she was in the home corner playing at the table - making dinner etc. She touched another little girl's hand and moved her over to sit at the table - obviously wanting to play with this little girl. The little girl wanted to play with something else in home corner - fair enough - dd1 knows that children won't always play with her as they like to do their own thing. BUT the mother - goes over to her daughter as dd1 is trying to play with her and moves her away from dd1 and points out lots of the other little girls on the class for her to play with.

red mist descended as a mother who felt my daughter was not good enough to play with and then I felt sorry for the other little girl who is not able to play where she wants.

Then I tried not to cry for dd1 who just wanted to play tea parties with another girl.

then I was thankful for a 2 1/2 yo sister who thinks dd1 is fabulous and can't wait for her to come home from kindy so they can play together.

sorry that should have read:

red mist descended at a mother not as a mother..

eidsvold. What an ignorant woman. Fair enough the little girl wanted to play something different but to have her mother's ignorance placed upon her is .

Oh eidsvold - that is sad .

I feel sorry for the other mum for being so very narrow minded and ignorant - how awful to have to live your life like that. What a lot she's missing out on without even realising.

I guess disability separates the wheat from the chaff - whether it is you realising who your real mates are, to situations like this. The people that your dd makes friends with throughout her life will be the real deal .

and with you

xx

So sad when something like this happens. I might have been inclined to have a little word in the mothers ear, something like "she is a little girl, like your daughter, not a flippin' monster!". My ds1 is at mainstream and has cp and cannot talk. The feeling of issolation for me (never mind ds1!) will, I'm sure, never go away when you drop off and collect your sn child. Generally you are avoided for chat (which I don't actually mind, I would rather chat to the kids anyway than talk about the weather!), but when you are faced with another mother moving her child away from interaction from yours, it is heartbreaking especially when any interaction at all however small is so longed for by a sn childs parent. Ignorance is the right word here. Don't worry, I take strength in the fact that when all the mothers go, I am sure that all the kids play happily together .

thats horrible eidsvold.
i would feel exactly the same as you, you did well to keep your calm.

her kindy teachers are fab and this year she has made some real little friends whose mum's delight in telling me they talk about dd1 at home a lot. There are other little girls who adore dd1 and that is fab to see. There is one in particular who dd1 talks about all the time too. Dd1 can sometimes be a little rough when holding hands - she likes to squeeze - so I told her friend to just say - gentle hands dd1. Well she did but when dd1 did gentle hands to her friend - her little friend went and told the teacher how fab dd1 was for doing gentle hands which was great to hear too - rather than kids telling tales about each other to have some positive feedback.

I think the fact that so many kids like her made this even worse iyswim. I know the mum has problems but I just had to leave before I cried and normally I have a tough old hide and not much gets to me but this did.

It got to me too when I read your OP

Oh Eidsvold....like a spear through the heart.

Bloody horrible woman - did she see that you had seen what she did?

What a nasty woman

Eidsvold

What a nasty, despicable, stupid, vile, horrible, foolish, unpleasant, cruel, disagreeable, distasteful, evil, hateful, unkind, ignorant, rude woman. You know, her daughter is the unlucky one here. She is losing out bigtime in not getting to be friends with your gorgeous dd1 and she clearly has a complete school-dinner-semolina-head for a mother. I'm so sorry you felt bad, eidsvold.

Everything Scummymummy said!

What a beautiful little girl your dd sounds with some very lovely friends,
This horrible lady must lead such a shallow nasty life.

just looked at your profile pic - your dd is gorgeous

no she was so wrapped up in her own little world that she did not see that I saw.

eidsvold - that makes me feel so sad, I'm just pleased that your DD wasn't aware of what was happening.

eidsvold - I thought about this all night. Feeling very for you and dd. Then I thought of an incident with myself and ds2 the other day at school where I may have come across the same way.

We have a little boy at school in a wheelchair. His legs and feet are quite turned. He is in a different year to dd and ds1 so we don't "know" him at all.

It was after school and he was waiting for his mum whilst she was talking to someone a few yards away. My ds2 (3) ran ahead and went up quite close to him and started pointing at his legs and in his loudest voice (hasn't discovered volume control yet) started telling us that his legs are "funny". I answered "yes ds2" and tried to keep walking. In typical 3 year old fashion he kept repeating it. I had no idea what to do. My first reaction was to pull him away quickly.

I am not sure if his mum noticed what happened. I honestly did not know what to do. My actions could have offended them. If we had stopped and I had let ds2 talk and point would have been offensive also. Still not sure how I should have handled it.

i think as a parent I would understand the other parent's embarrassment with regards to the situation you described BUT these girls have been in the same kindy class since January!!

I don't mind talking with little ones about dd1 and things like that it is the adult ignorance that I find hard to deal with. Embarrassment on the part of parents I can also understand. I also understand little ones curiosity with things that are different.

As I said - usually rhino hide me just brushes these things off as their loss and problem but that one really got to me.

Completely understandable that it upsets and angers you. It upsets and angers my and it is not my dd!!