DS, hfa, never played computer games.... should I let him so that he fits in better with his NT buddies?

[SophieofShepherdsBush]

Inspired by another thread. Ds is 6, recently diagnosed. We are not a gaming family, and I always thought they would be a bad idea due to his obsessive behavior and addictive personality! I recently noticed he and his friends playing an imaginative let's pretend outdoor role play game....based on Minecraft, which ds knows nothing about. He has a great imagination btw, and was trying to plau along, but "getting it wrong". The other kids already perceive him as different ; would it be a bad idea to introduce some computer games as a means of giving him common ground with his peers? TV and sweet things are already problematic in this house...I'm not sure about adding gaming to the mix. But I also think he'd love it, and give him something to play and chat about with his pals. Not to mention, it might have benefits I don't know about? I dont know. I hate him being left out just because we've said no to games, but he has shades of ADHD, so bad idea? Rod for our own backs?

I agree with polter Dd3 watches You Tubers and plays minecraft and Sims, it gives her a common interest with other teenagers.

She has designed musical stuff on minecraft and done artwork.

She does get obssessed with it some days but usually those days are days when she needs down time anyway.

We are home ed so she does potentially have more opportunity to play online games but we have a rule that gadgets (except her phone) stay either at home or in the car when we are out and we go out virtually every day at some point.

Of course at the moment she is doing Pokemon Go, she is loving it and we have been to some nice places while looking for Pokemon

Ok thanks. Polter your dad has PDA type traits us that right? Ds very PDA ish. I've found your posts useful before!

Can you tell me what equipment we'd need? I am completely ignorant and confused by the different consoles etc available.

DD, not dad!

DS argh

Thanks too, ineed

(I quite like playing Minecraft myself, don't tell my children)

What works in our house (with one ADHD, poss ASD and one NT) is to have at timer and a set daily limit on screen time. That way it's clear when time is up, it's not me just being arbitrary about when to stop. The timer can be paused for whatever reason but time isn't ever carried over to the next day.

Games like Minecraft and Age of Empires / Star Wars Battle Commander are winners, never, never games that don't have a defined end or can't be saved and continued another day. Haven't ventured into online multi-player, that just scares me.

Dd3 plays minecraft on a tablet and on the laptop. She doesnt play online because she doesnt like people in her worlds but she does play with her friend when they are together.

Ok, thanks! Im debating the issue with dh, who still has reservations.

I think it could be very good for ds. Ask dh to reconsider.

Yes oblomov, I think it would be good too. I want to redirect his obsession to something more mainstream, as his specialist subject is quite niche. Computer games would be acceptable to his NT peers and make him stand out less( not trying to change him by the way, just want to pave the way so life is as easy ad it can be for him)

OK I'm going to download Minecraft onto my phone and suss it out myself first. Thanks for the advice.