So my dad wants to wait until Ds grows out of his autism...

[twinkletoedelephant]

My dad said he thinks it will be easier to spend time with the boys ( currently once a month if they are lucky) when they are older and grow out of their ASD and ADHD

I could almost believe he was just naive... But my brother has severe LD ( prob ASD but never tested)

Pretty much sums it up how he never listens to a word I have ever said :-(

I had all that crap off my mother. They'll grow out of it. pfft.

Sorry you are feeling sad. It does feel crap, I understand.

Wow.

Would sitting down and having a frank conversation about ASD and ADHD help at all? Any books/websites/booklets etc to really bring home how these are lifelong conditions? Or getting someone else to tell him? Or having him sit in on a pead appt? Reading diagnosis letters? Anything?!

If he finds it hard seeing them once a month, how does he think you feel looking after them day in, day out?!

I'm sorry he hasn't been more supportive OP! You'd think having a child with LD would mean he was a bit more clued up, wouldn't you?!

Oh dear

Maybe your dad will grow out of his silly ideas.

it's just as likely, at any rate.