I have just received DD1s report from the speach and language therapist, not sure what to do now.

[WhenTheDragonsCame]

DD1 was referred to CAMHS when she was in year 6, she is now in year 8.

The concerns were around her friendships, she was behind in English and maths plus she didn't really understands safety or things like eating (eating too much and taking food she didn't need).

Other unrelated people (quite a few actually) have asked if she has issues, standing too close and getting in people faces without realising. A couple of people have asked if she is autistic, but I don't think she is.

We had a few meetings with the lady from CAMHS before the psychologist said it wasn't autism and thought it was emotional. He referred her for counselling, which she has had through school, and to see the speach and language therapist to assess for processing difficulties.

The report says things like she was really fidgety, some times made silly noises, on the second visit she was quiet because she was missing art but had suggested the time herself, supposedly she has been having nightmares since her step dad died (she sleeps in the room next to mine and I've heard nothing plus she has denighed this when I have asked), she is low average range for all of the understanding which would seembcommensurate with other cognitive skills, the school have said she some times tells 'fibs' and ends up 'getting in a muddle' and she likes and often needs the support of adults.

Sorry this is a long post but I don't know what this really means and I'm on the verge of giving up. Nobody seems to take my concerns seriously and the school are saying there is nothing wrong.

Basically should I just accept that this is how she is and there is nothing wrong?

Thank you.

The school are saying there is nothing wrong

This is clearly nonsense.

If your dd is repeatedly standing too close and getting in people's faces then she needs to be given extra help to learn not to do this.

It doesn't matter whether it has a name like autistic spectrum disorder or not. The law is clear - your dd's tendency to get body language wrong is a special educational need and the law is also clear that her needs must be met.

This would typically be through weekly small group therapy and a programme set by a qualified speech and language therapist to learn spacing in groups (whether it is queues, conversations, standing in a circle etc).

I am interested why you have ruled out Autistic Spectrum Condition (new and better name of ASD). Of course you are close to dd and know better than anyone how she presents. You know her best and I don't want to presume to tell you anything.

It is just that I have seen heat teachers get this wrong. ASC spans every level of IQ and can run alongside any other disability. Most ASC children do not have a huge talent in some area. Every ASC child presents differently, some show better imagination, some show better empathy, some have very good eye contact. I heard a head teacher say that the ASD diagnosis must be wrong because the child had showed empathy by putting her arm around a child who was crying. And yet every playtime she spent all her time alone spinning in circles away from all the others. Very frustrating for her mum that they were doing nothing about it.

The psychologist told me it wasn't ASD as she doesn't have any obsessions.

The speech and language therapist said she doesn't need to be seen by her and her case is being closed.

I had parents evening a couple of weeks ago and her English teacher told me that her SATs results were too high so she will never reach her targets. I asked if he was aware that she had been screened at primary and I had been told that she had traits of mild dyslexia but the teacher told me that dyslexia is extremely rare and he has only seen it twice in the seven years of teaching. When I mentioned it to her tutor he said well he is her teacher so he must be right. The tutor then told me that that she has no social skills problems (and asked if she thought she did, she said no) yet in the report it says the school told them she tells fibs and a woman from the youth club she goes to told me she gets over excited and up in peoples faces all the time.

With the standing too close to people she doesn't realise that she does it. Her PE teacher in year 7, who also refers for counselling and has been great, said that she is really fast at getting dressed and the teacher had to give her a job until the rest were ready or DD1 would be nearly stood on her toes but DD1 says she didn't do that.

It feels like I'm banging my head against a brick wall, I have had primary school saying they have concerns, random people I don't even know saying to friends she appears to be vulnerable yet her secondary school are saying she is fine.

She does have friends but they either have their own issues or special needs so probably more understanding, are 5 years younger than she is or know but put up with it.

Sorry that's turned into a bit of an essay again.

The psychologist told me it wasn't ASD as she doesn't have any obsessions.

A diagnosis would usually come from a paediatrician, I don't think psychologists are qualified to judge. There is a book on how ASD/C presents in girls, who mask better than boys. Does she have any special interests at home? Regardless, she has social communication differences that will make navigating the mainstream world

The speech and language therapist said she doesn't need to be seen by her and her case is being closed.
They do. They are obliged to give SALT in blocks of 6 or 8 so tend to recommend that.

the teacher told me that dyslexia is extremely rare and he has only seen it twice in the seven years of teaching
Your teacher is at best wrong and at worst lying. If the teacher has seen it only in seven years, they need their eyes opening.

You are being fobbed off big time. I would say that you should ask for an EHCP but as things stand the LA is likely to refuse, so some extra evidence would improve your chances.

There are two ways to go. The Polter way is to read up everything and then get to the professionals by any route available. With luck Polter will see this and give you more help on the steps to take.

The other option, if you can find funds from anywhere, is to get independent reports. Independent EPs can diagnose dyslexia and SALTs can diagnose whatever language issues are causing difficulties.

I'll see if I can get Polter over as finding funds is not easy.
She is normally on this board www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs

Bear with me

Actually could you re-post this on www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs

Or looked at another way, go to the child tab, pick special needs off the drop down list, then at the bottom of the page, go to 'chat about your child'

It is so much busier there and lots of people to help

Is that OK?

If not, I'll PM Polter and see if she can help.

Thank you.

I have spoken to the PSA at her old primary (other DC still attend) and she has advised that I go to my GP and request a referal to the child development centre.

I haven't got time now but I will try and move this to the other board later.

Thank you

This is very tricky. It's so hard when they don't quite fit and you feel that no one is listening to you.
What does you GP think? Mine referred us to the Paed. Could that be a possibility for you?