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Original poster

birthday party made me feel so sad.

22 replies

iloveithere · 21/09/2014 17:46

DS had his first ever birthday party planned. He struggles with lots of people and noise, so we only invited 8 kids from his class. 2 told me straight away that they couldn't come, fair enough. Two called up 30 mins before to say their children were too ill to come. Two didn't show up. So only 2 turned up. Some of my friends were there with their kids, so the party went ok. But I feel really sad. I don't know if the excuses were real, or I the parents don't want their kids mixing with my ds. Or if the kids themself didn't want to come. He does have behaviour issues, but I thought the parents would have given him a chance, even if it meant they stayed to keep an eye on their children
I feel so sad and trying not to cry.

OP posts:
Jasonandyawegunorts · 21/09/2014 17:56

Thanks please don't cry, the excuses might have been real, and they did warn you it would have been worse if they left you standing.

Try and see the good in it, you have 2 friends for him in the making and he might not have been able to handle a party with 8 + people, it could have been a disaster and too overwhelming for him.

Did he enjoy it, i hope he liked it, that's all that really matters?

troutsprout · 21/09/2014 17:58

Aww....Sad. I'm sorry

Icantfindaname · 21/09/2014 17:59

This may be nothing to do with his SN you know?
Most people are really flaky and with birthday invites just ignore them. No one RSVP's. I think everyone thinks they are just one and leaves it to everyone else!

DD invited about 6 classmates to her party and 2 came. No one who didn't come RSVP'd to tell me.

People are just weird.

Did he enjoy his birthday?

Original poster
iloveithere · 21/09/2014 18:00

Yes he had a great time, and is now flaked out on my lap watching tv, very tired and full of chocolate!

OP posts:
Icantfindaname · 21/09/2014 18:03

That's great :)

I hope you feel less sad tomorrow. Flowers

Original poster
iloveithere · 21/09/2014 18:12

I know it might not be to do with sn, I'm just upset. I had checked on Thursday if they were all coming, they all said yes. He is happy, so I should be, I know.

OP posts:
babyinarms · 21/09/2014 18:26

So sorry to hear that. The excuses may have been genuine but I know how u must be feeling. My DS Ffirst party .....we had no diagnosis and he was 5....the friends turned up but no one played with him! He was crying and upset afterwards which nearly killed me!
From then on we have 2 or 3 friends of his choice...always the same....he'll be ten this year and it works out so much better.
He has his friends so thats fantastic...just keep it to them.
So sorry again....Flowers

Original poster
iloveithere · 21/09/2014 18:37

Thanks babyinarms, I think I'm ok now, we will stick to days out for his birthday from now on, just like in previous years.

OP posts:
PolterGoose · 21/09/2014 18:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jasonandyawegunorts · 21/09/2014 18:40
Flowers
tabulahrasa · 21/09/2014 18:48

On my DS's 8th birthday I invited his whole class...2 came, it upset me for years, he was perfectly happy with his 2 classmates and some close friends and family members in a hall with a bouncy castle that wasn't overcrowded, lol.

It's heartbreaking eh?

Icantfindaname · 21/09/2014 18:49

I was meaning to sound unsympathetic - sorry.

Original poster
iloveithere · 21/09/2014 18:58

Oh tabulahrasa, that is so sad.

OP posts:
tabulahrasa · 21/09/2014 19:06

I was so upset over it, he was happy as Larry, lol

At the time I was honestly just devastated, he should be having a big birthday party like other children, all that sort of thing you know? Now (he's 18) I think, ach, he was happy, stuff it, what does it matter?

He's done better socially as he got older anyway, I mean not that he suddenly got popular at school or anything, but he found a wee peer group and it's nice.

Jasonandyawegunorts · 21/09/2014 19:10

I've never had a birthday part with people from school, only invited someone over once and was NEVER invited to a birthday party.
I can honestly say it was something that just didn't bother me in the slightest, Some people are just happier without socialising.
But i can fully understand why it would be upsetting to you,, as most people would equate it with loneliness.

babyinarms · 21/09/2014 19:57

Glad u feeling a bit better. Have a niceBrew or bettet still a glass of Wine.
Look after yourself and your DS is lucky to have u in his corner Smile

Original poster
iloveithere · 21/09/2014 20:08

Having the Brew now, got Wine waiting for when (if) he finally sleeps.Smile

OP posts:
babyinarms · 21/09/2014 20:54

Here's hoping Smile

Jacksterbear · 21/09/2014 20:57

(((Hugs))) ilove, that would have really upset me too.

How is the sleeping going these days?

Original poster
iloveithere · 21/09/2014 21:13

Not great, jackster, I've got another thread about that tonight, too the sleep clinic was useless. Still awake right now, but quietly playing, so I'm leaving him to it. But still sitting outside his room, worried if I move he will kick off. How about you?

OP posts:
Jacksterbear · 21/09/2014 21:16

Bad Sad. Will have a look for your other thread.

Viviennemary · 21/09/2014 21:26

If he has had a great time then that's the main thing. But I don't blame you for being annoyed with those no shows and excuse makers. It's cheeky.

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