Need help and advice re DS age 8 and possible asd and ADHD.

[Imsuchamess]

DS cries nearly every night and is on the verge of panic attacks about various things eg me dying, him dying someone in our family dying.

He has no friends and school have said he finds it hard to socialise because he will only play games that are to his interest.

He is very fussy about socks endlessly complaining about them irritating him.

He finds it hard to understand imaginative play.

He is overly rough and shouts all the time being unable to use a quiet voice.

He has trouble sleeping.

He had a speech delay.

He has extremely poor handwriting.

He has extreme outbursts if routine is disturbed.

He is aggressive often hitting and kicking me.

He is very dominating.

He has a younger sibling diagnosed with classic autism.

Yet school are saying there is nothing wrong with him and I feel there is. But by school saying to everyone that they refer a select number of pupils each year and while DS shows some symptoms of a developmental disorder they are so mild they would not have referred him.

I feel my DS is very intelligent yet he is under achieve ing and I feel this is because of asd. I also feel his intelligence is masking his issues.

How do I convince cahms to take my word over schools?

Can you not go to your gp and ask for a referral though? In our area it would be the paeds at the CDC who would assess an 8 year old rather than CAMHS - but your gp can refer to both I would think? It sounds very much that you have enough there for a referral.

Thanks both he has been referred by gp to cahms and peadiatrician. I'm just scared they won't take me seriously with schools attitude.

I know plenty of kids with dxs of ASD about whom school insisted they were fine. I am a primary teacher and I know we don't necessarily have any training about ASDs and even where we do this will be brief. In almost 20 years of teaching I have had one twilight session on ASDs of 2 hours duration and that was only a few years ago! When dd1 was diagnosed I discovered how little I really knew. Some teachers know loads but most don't.

My son displays exactly like your son and our school is also sure there is nothing to see in our case too. We are seeing the comm paed in September and I am so worried the schools attitude will reflect in what they say/do.

It is very disheartened :(

Don't worry.

DD behaves 'perfectly' at school, but we still got an dx of ASD fairly easily once we got through to the psychiatrist.

I too was worried that what school would say would affect my credibility, but psych said they see this often and can read between the lines of what a school says and pick little bits of seemingly insignificant info from the schools involved.

It can take a long time to get to someone who can dig nose, and I must have repeated myself at least 4 times to different people along the way.

Stay strong, be patient, and don't let anyone fob you off.

Good luck.

btw, I found the book The Explosive Child really really helpful.