See community paed before Cahms referral?

[Sops]

Just been to see GP tonight.
He says we do need a referral to cahms but as school nurse has already referred ds to the community paed it would be best to wait and see what paed says, then he will refer to cahms. I did say to him would that not take a long time, he said wouldn't make much difference and it will all take quite a while anyway.
Is this the usual route? I don't know this doctor well, and I'm not 100% confident in him!

What is the referral for?

Both may take ages to come through - get your DC referred to both asap and see whoever comes first.

We have had to go through the community paed here which is just such a waste of time and resources. Had an appointment this week and despite a psychologists report (NHS, done in London as part of other assessments) saying DD needs to complete an autism assessment the paed is saying the school need to complete a form first, then there will be a paeds meeting to decided whether to refer on to the autism team, and then the autism team will meet to decide whether to see DD. Am fuming right now, no wonder the NHS is financially struggling. If you can push to be referred directly I would.

Referral is for ds anger management/emotional outbursts issues.
But is it all a bit of a waste of time really? Sometimes I'm not sure what it is that I'm wanting out of this. Whatever is the issue for ds (we think it is pathological demand avoidance) dh and I still have to deal with it. Is there any real help out there? Or are we best to just try and try and try to sort it out ourselves????? We have been doing that for the last two years but maybe if we have some clues (ie. suspected PDA) we can make more impact on behaviour??