How and when to explain an autism diagnosis to my five-year-old

[Anymoor]

my daughter has just turned 5, so young for her school year. She had a diagnosis of autism while still at nursery (4) and had an EHCP done when she started school. She loves school but struggles with reading and writing but is very hyper focused on her interests and can tell you facts on space and history that are very detailed. I suspect she is dyslexic. She struggles with melt downs and emotions.

we have not specifically told her she is autistic as it has never come up. Yesterday she was wearing a sunflower lanyard (given to her by a play worker at nursery ’to help people understand that she likes to look closely at things to understand’ while at a museum and another visitor (a young adult) asked her if she had autism and started taking to her quite intensely about it. I chatted with the boy and my daughter didn’t really pick up on the autism part, we just chatted about how friendly he was and it was nice to have a chat. But it has made me realise that I need to talk to her about it. I don’t want to label her in her head or make her think she is different in a negative way. I am also worried that she will start to struggle in year 1 in September as she is significantly behind her peers with reading etc but just hasn’t realised yet.

any advice for how/when to have a conversation? I don’t want it to become her personality but also want her to be aware?

there is also a lot of negativity about too many diagnosis at the moment and it makes me conscious of people judging her.

When any of her behavior reflects Autism, such as repetitive behavior at that time when stopping her, you can make her understand what autism is and how we can manage it to control the severity of the symptoms.

My DS is ADHD and ASD, he’s 7.

i didn’t want to sit him down and say your this, you’ve been diagnosed with this.
the dr told me to approach it as pp has said, when he does something autistic or adhd. This is for all types of behaviour that comes with being ND. So not just when needing to correct her.
so for example her special interest being space you can tell her being autistic makes this subject so interesting for her and she’s able to gather all the information etc

he now comes to me and says which side of my brain was that.
he took it really well, granted doesn’t understand the extent but he’s really interested in others who are also autistic adhd.

I keep it upbeat and positive.

Thank you both, not sure why I feel it is such a big thing, I just don’t want to mess it up or cause her worry