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SEN

Here you'll find advice from parents and teachers on special needs education.

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Original poster

Possible dyslexia - school not listening to us

28 replies

Didiplanthis · 31/08/2016 00:35

Ok. I hope this is in the right place. It may seem trivial compared with what alot if you are dealing with but I thought people on here would have the best advice on fighting your child's corner. My dd is nearly 7, she is very bright and flew through early years then everything ground to a halt. Having been way ahead she is now just above average , she hadn't made any progress at all with her reading in a year and is now struggling with other subjects like maths as she is quite advanced in her understanding but can't read the questions, she is bursting with good ideas but can't get them down on paper struggles for ages then gives up really demoralised and sad. School don't see a problem because she is still young and not behind. I see a bright kid who loves school losing her way and giving up. I have tried to talk to them but seem to be being labelled pushy and expecting too much. I can't get them to see I don't care if she is ahead , average or behind if it that is what she is capable of but there is a ever widening gap between her cognitive ability and written work/reading. I have a very very strong family history of dyslexia and am increasingly seeing indicators in her but there is no way school will put in assessments etc as she is not behind. If I go ahead with private ed psych should I tell them this is what we are doing or just present them with a report if it confirms it ? I am worried about being judged but want to work with them and not look like I am going behind their backs. Obviously I want it to be fine and there not to be a problem but if there is I want to know so I can help her.

OP posts:

GiddyOnZackHunt · 31/08/2016 00:40

Some areas don't refer to or diagnose dyslexia on the NHS anymore. Friend of mine discovered this recently. They have had a private report done by the local respected practioner and will be presenting this when terms starts.

dataandspot · 31/08/2016 00:44

We had to pay for a report. £380.

Jonso · 31/08/2016 00:49

Tell the teacher you intend to pay for a private diagnosis
Ask them when you can arrange a meeting with SENCO and head to discuss results

3, Be prepared for much banging your head against a brick a wall as you try to get any recommendations enforced

Soozikinzi · 31/08/2016 00:53

There are specialist dyslexia tutors if you google one in your area they will know straight away and you will have the evidence you need and they will be able to help eg some respond to coloured filters over the page to stop the letters appearing to jump about "You may be able to get a laptop with a spell checker for exams and stuff as she gets older there's loads of help out there.My sons gf just got a first in economics and she is dyslexic xx

Original poster

Didiplanthis · 31/08/2016 00:59

Wow - what a great response for 1 am ! Glad I'm not the only one up at stupid o'clock ( I'm up worrying - hope you all aren't ! ) We have found an ed psych and are happy to pay just don't want to piss school off when we may need them on side !!

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liane77 · 31/08/2016 01:20

This could be my daughter but I'm wondering about dyspraxia. Her reading age is 9) she is 6) but her writing is all transposed and so are her numbers. Her mental arithmetic is great but her numbers are back to front. She was always ahead and this year came home just close to her age expectations on her report not even secure. On questioning the teacher, it was mostly down to her writing ability

ScarlettSahara · 31/08/2016 01:25

Didi I would act swiftly. When DD was 6/7 yrs I was disappointed that her apparently quick brain did not translate into progress at school but concerns were dismissed.
Eventually HT suspected dyscalculia and suggested referral. Months later I found out form teacher over-ruled it.
To cut a long story short she lost confidence and we paid for ed psych at 14 who diagnosed dyslexia, dyscalculia ,poor working memory and short term memory yet high IQ. I feel let down really so I would say if you can afford it get her assessed quickly. Agree that if you inform school they may take you more seriously. Like you we are not especially pushy but just felt something was amiss. Good luck

Original poster

Didiplanthis · 31/08/2016 01:27

My dd had a reading age of about 8 at 5 1/2. She is now nearly 7 and still has a reading age of 8 !!! Apparently school think this is fine and not an issue not that they actually know as no one listens to them read. Will it still be fine when she is 10 and still has a reading age of 8 ?

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Original poster

Didiplanthis · 31/08/2016 01:30

Feeling so much better about this and what we are doing now. Great support on here !

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Stevefromstevenage · 31/08/2016 01:32

Have there been any indicators of dyslexia. DD has dyslexia but is also g&t and evening with the disparity teachers spotted differences in her abilities from within a month of starting school. I was the opposite of you, they spotted them, i had not do it is brilliant you are conscious of it. If there are any indicators I would go for assessment it has helped my DD so much to hand that diagnosis.

Stevefromstevenage · 31/08/2016 01:33

I am up late after a party forgive the spelling

Original poster

Didiplanthis · 31/08/2016 01:38

No school were all excited about her being g+t ( I never thought she was - just bright and hard working ) and now seem disappointed in her ! She's still just as bright but can't get it out but she is also very good and blends quietly into the background so never obvious if you know what I mean.

OP posts:

ilovesushi · 31/08/2016 10:09

I would call for a meeting with your child's teacher, express your concerns and inform them you are going to have her assessed privately by an EP. The EP will probably want to observe your child in class and speak to the teacher as part of the assessment, so they will make contact with the school anyway. I would jump in first to smooth the way with the school. You want everyone to be cooperating and working together for your child. The EP will have recommendations for you as a parent and for the school.
Good luck with it all. We found getting a proper detailed assessment very empowering. x

MirabelleTree · 31/08/2016 10:15

We ended up paying as I knew with how DS was doing at school they wouldn't take my concerns seriously, it was definitely money well spent. It has helped DS as he kind of knew his mind worked in different ways.

He'll be transferring to High school next September so current school are going to liaise with them about him using a lap top. He now has extra time in tests though to date hasn't needed it. The SENCO said the report only lasts so long and to factor in the cost of another before GCSE.

JumpingJetFlash · 04/09/2016 19:11

Sorry to go off thread but liane77 have you considered dysgraphia rather than dyspraxia. It has many of the same issues as dyslexia but affects writing, including motor and also organisation. Our 9yr old has just been identified as dysgraphic after we paid for a private ed psych to come and see her. School were slow to act as she wasn't behind and 'there are others who are weaker in her class' but we saw a massive disparity between her verbal/ reading ability and the written content she was producing and this disparity was widening as she got older. Anyway HTH.

grafia123 · 05/09/2016 20:36

My ds is 7 and has dyslexia and dysgraphia. He has been given an alpha smart to use at school instead of writing. Typing is the way forward for him. I told the school ds was being assessed privately so they knew the report would be coming. It has changed alot of things. It was well worth the money. liane77 I agree that you should consider dysgraphia.

dataandspot · 06/09/2016 10:43

What's alpha smart?

grafia123 · 06/09/2016 15:11

I haven't seen the alpha smart yet, he only has it in the classroom at the moment. It is a word processor I think. Ds says it has a small screen so he only sees the line he is typing. I think it can correct spelling mistakes. I have heard of a lot of kids in this local authority getting them. They can take them home to do homework on.

liane77 · 07/09/2016 04:29

Thank you for suggesting dysgraphia, I will look into it X

elfonshelf · 09/09/2016 20:40

So sorry to read about the struggles you are having and that the school are being dismissive.

I'm in a similar situation with DD - except that her school are the ones raising the issue, and for the same reasons that you have given: very bright child with a huge and growing disparity between verbal ability and reading/writing ability.

I've been told that 7 is the age to try and get things diagnosed formally and to try and stop them falling behind. DD's Y2 teacher said that they had managed to get her up to 'meeting expectations' for reading but it was with a lot of effort and help and DD was a child who they would have expected to be 'exceeding expectations' based on her intelligence.

I felt awful because I even asked the staff if I was being some dreadful parent with a PFB who I just assumed would take after her parents (super-selectives, scholarships, Oxbridge etc) and was it the case that DD was actually just not that bright. If it was, I'd rather know - I just want DD to enjoy school and learning and be meeting her potential whatever that might be.

Happy to pass on any tips that I get. One thing I have done is order a set of coloured reading rulers which DD is trying out - £10 on Amazon for a set of 11. I also had her hearing and eye-sight tested and told the optician that we were worried because she refused to read so that they could look for anything that might be a concern.

If you have Kindle, the book 'Defeating Dyslexia' seems quite good - and for some reason was free (£10.99 for the paperback) - it was only published in April.

Original poster

Didiplanthis · 10/09/2016 23:00

Elf - that makes me feel so much better - I have also been through the pfb / high expectation thing ( both parents high achieving professionals ) and considered the 'is she just not as bright as we thought' options and even spoke to school about this ! Actually I have now had a proper chat with school and they are being really good and supportive now - I think because she is still exceeding they hadn't really considered it. We are taking things forward now and will see how things pan out but I will check out that kindle book.

OP posts:

MissBrooke · 10/09/2016 23:19

Hi, hope you don't mind me joining you late to the party but didi and elf you could be describing DD.

Extremely articulate: using complex sentences with subclauses etc from the age of about 2.5 (God I bet this sounds so off-putting but it's difficult to describe the disparity as many PPs have pointed out) able to count backwards from 30 etc from under 2, but very poor at reading. Low interest, can't retain the words (apart from say the first 20 common words). Same with number.
I have no interest in having my child a prodigy or whatever, think it really doesn't help them in life, I just have the feeling that if we don't help her she could lose confidence, feel different & therefore feel isolated. I'm sure she thinks in a different way.
I'm sorry I think I'm de-railing your thread elf. I might have had a couple of gins. That I poured myself. Ahem.
This has been cathartic. Perhaps we (and elf) could pm each other? I need a kick up the arse to address ....

Original poster

Didiplanthis · 11/09/2016 01:56

Pm'd you missbrooke

OP posts:

1981m · 21/12/2018 21:46

I am worried my ds might be dyslexic. We are thinking of booking a private assessor to do the formal assessment on him.

How does this work? Would the assessor come to the school and carry it out in school hours if they need to observe him? If the school is hostile to this, would they allow the assessment to take place at the school during school hours or is it more common to go the assessors place of with evenings or weekends?

Thistly · 22/12/2018 09:44

You could read up on how assessments are carried out on the website of the British dyslexia association. Good luck with the process.

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