naps/no naps/nap nap nap. Please reassure me before head goes in (electric) oven

[alison56]

We have a lovely little girl who is four now but when she was a baby she drove us INSANE with her refusal to take naps longer than about 15 minutes. She used to pull her eyelashes to keep herself awake and her childminder was also completely frazzled.

As you can imagine, she was a grumpy, unhappy, sleep deprived child and remained so until she grew out of the need for naps. Even now she wakes up at about 5.30am.

Her lack of daytime sleep contributed a great deal to my feeling depressed over a long period.

We now have a second daughter who is 7 weeks old. She also takes only short naps, but I don't know whether this is simply what 7 week old babies do. Unlike her older sister, she likes the dummy, so at least has a way to self-soothe. She does, however, spit the dummy out and wake herself up, which is a large part of the reason for her short naps.

Please reassure me this is wha 7 week old babies do? When do they get into a better napping routine?

I feel despondent at the thought of going through the same thing again

My son was rubbish at naps- slept for the first 2 days of his life then woke up!
He got better as he got older though and at 13mo has just started taking 2-3 hour naps in the morning which I like a lot.
7 weeks is really early to be settled into a napping routine. She's not the same baby and may turn out to be a wonderful napper. How're the nights?

Babies don't 'get'routine until at least 4 months - whatever anyone says. Make sure she is burped properly because indigestion could be upsetting her. Also she might like some music? Or to be with the family with familiar noise around her. Please try and get some sleep(and naps)yourself and explain to darling 4 year old that 5.30am is the middle of the night and bribe her to go back to bed.

My 2 never got into a nap pattern until they were on 3 meals a day, so about 7 months

then it would be an hour at about 9am in the pushachir when we were out and an hour or two after lunch in the cot

just try and enjoy your baby and try to forget about what happened the first tiem round

do you think you might still be depressed/ you sound very anxious xxx

thanks for your replies

The nights are fairly good (her sister was exactly the same). She feeds all evening (formula fed) and we do a bath/bottle/bed routine and she goes down at 8pm (awake).

She misses the 10pm and 2am feed and wakes up between 4-5am so we've begun dream feeding at midnight, which means she wakes about 5.30 instead.

Our four year old is brilliant. Despite waking at 5.30, we have trained her to occupy herself until 7am (she has a digital clock). I set up playmobil and that sort of thing before she goes to bed.

I am trying to enjoy the baby, and she's certainly much smilier than DD1 but it really was very hard to deal with, particularly since we spent a year abroad when she was a baby and we had no friends or family to help. I know it's different (and that she's a different baby) but it helps to hear it won't necessarily be the same this time round.

I don't think I'm depressed but I AM anxious that this awful depressing situation will happen all over again. Se do burp her, though she is particularly windy and short of the usual Gripe Water/Infacol I don't know what else to do.

You are doing just great. DD1 sounds like a lovely, alert, responsive child whom you have guided to being happy on her own. Well done. All children are different (my first two were twins - one slept through at 3 months, the other at 16 months......so much for applying blanket routines.......). Possibly, you need to get more sleep yourself?..... and don't forget Babies love the sound of small children, so DD2 will benefit from an older sibling being around. Don't worry and try to take a nap yourself when you can.

thanks for your support

If the nights are good, don't sweat it about the naps, just rest when you can. I wasted a LOT of time worrying about my son's sleep. It's so hard not to, especially when you're desperate for more sleep yourself, but it doesn't help at all and certainly doesn't improve their sleep! If she's sleeping ok at night, maybe she just doesn't want as much sleep as you think she should?
I don't have any tips about the wind- try a new thread about that I'm sure there's lots of MN wisdom out there about that!