Settling 5 week old in the evenings - suggestions please

[littleduck]

Hi

My 5 week old usually settles quite well to sleep in her moses basket in the day after feeds (she clearly hasn't read the books which say she should be doing some sort of 'activity' after feeding or should be put to sleep awake as she just zonks out after she's been fed); however in the evenings she appears to zonk out as usual but has now started to wake up and cry about 10 minutes after I put her down.

Again, I have read a couple of books which advocate leaving her for up to 10 minutes to see if she settles. I'm not sure this is the right way to go but the shush/pat thing doesn't seem to work for her and she hates being swaddled, if I pick her up she might stop crying but will cry as soon as I put her in her basket so I am fresh out of ideas for getting her to settle.

As I say she usually settles well most of the time including after feeds in the night and settled well this evening.

All thoughts appreciated.

Parenting is an art rather than a science. Mothers have wildly different opinons and what works with one child does not work for another.

My daughter hated the moses basket with a passion so now sleeps in the cot with the side removed and touching our bed. Our night time routine is put on "relaxing birth music" (natal hypnotheraphy) feed and then I cuddle her to sleep until she is almost asleep. I then put her in her cot. If she wakes again I then give another cuddle. I don't let my daughter cry as she is very little. (7 weeks)

Many people advocate letting the baby cry a little bit which has some advantages and disadvantages. Certainly a baby who completely settles themselves is less likely to wake you in the night. However it can be hard hearing your baby cry and its a nightmare if you are trying to get an older child to bed at the same time.

There are times when babies have growth spurts and it can be particularly hard to get them to settle. However it does get better.

my ds is 12wo now but i have always done the same bedtime routine. initially bath (johnsons nighttime baby bath) feed and then bed. at 5 weeks i was feeding in a dimly lit bedroom in silence which seemed to help. when he was 9wo i got shown how to do a bit of baby massage so now routine is bath, massage, feed, bed. occasionally i bathed him at midnight as he'd fallen asleep at feed before i bathed him.

i dont let him cry as i think he is still too small for that. good luck

Personally I wouldn't leave a 5 wk old cry for more than a minute, just don't think it's right at that age. My DS is 15 wks now and we used white noise for him (hair dryer, vacuum cleaner, fan, etc) - worked a treat for a while. He now settles really well. With DD (3.7yrs) bugger all would settle her other than cuddles and BF.

It does get better and easier though. Promise

I don't really do anything different in the evenings. DS2 is 6 weeks and feeds frequently. I just cart him around with me and when I go to bed, so does he. We co-sleep, and he generally conks out around 11ish, wakes at 4ish and I feed lying down and we go back to sleep until 6ish when we are woken up by the toddler.

I'll introduce some sort of schedule when he goes into his own room at 6 months or so. I did the same with DS1.

Both boys have cluster fed in the evening so I'm much comfier downstairs with sofa, laptop at TV.

Oh, and I swaddle. Arms out works better. Are you getting all the wind?

I do leave him cry. Sometimes DS1 can't be left so I have to leave him sometimes, but only for as long as it takes to sort the older one.

If you are able to cuddle her, give her a cuddle until she settles. Until 5wks ago, she was being held by you 24/7, and the transition from needy little hitch-hiker to independent young person takes years...

Seriously though, she is probably a bit young to worry about "bad habits" or expect a particular "method" to "work" every time.

It can be hard to adjust to being incessantly on call to another person, but especially in the early months, if you can surrender to her calls, you'll both be loads happier.

It does sound like she is fairly easy to keep happy most of the time, so take heart that things generally get easier and you have a made a good start together.