Would turning off the baby monitor help?

[WibblyPigRocks]

Last night my 8mo went to sleep on his own as normal at 7pm, but woke at 9.45, 11.45, 2.30, 3.40, 4.50 and 6 before waking up for the day at 7.

The night before he went to sleep as normal, but woke at 11 and 3 before waking up for the day at 7.

I'm BFing and usually feed him when he wakes up although unless he only wakes up once, in which case he does often feed, he only uses me for comfort - but I know he can sleep on his own because he always does it at the start of the night. I know it's only comfort because he only sucks for a few seconds before going to sleep but he screams if DH goes in and apparently just keeps looking towards the door.

My mum says I should turn off my baby monitor so that I don't wake up until he really needs me (he is in the next room) - what do people think?

it depends weather your going in when he stirs before hes really awake...
do you think he's coming down with something.. or maybe is cold...

thats a lot of times to wake up....

There will be lots of different answers to this one, but I suspect that last night something was waking him up. Might be teeth, wind, might be start of something ear ache or similar. Its difficult to know what is normal for you based on the past two nights.

Night time waking is pretty normal for babies at his age, its just all you seem to hear about are mums with babies who slept through from 6 weeks. Trust me there are legions of women out there who know your pain.

I would suggest you do what feels right. If you think he is just stirring by all means leave it a few minutes to see if he resettles if you feel comfortable with it, but dont let other people push you into solutions that dont suit your child or your style of parenting. My personal opinion is that it does pass, that there are no magic fixes and you just have to hang in there and make sure you are grabbing all the rest you can. My eldest daughter suddenly turned into a perfect sleeper at 2 years old and so I am just waiting out DD2!

Hope things get better for you.

I honestly think that if you rush in there every time he stirs and squeaks then you are doing him no favours. Babies have short sleep cycles and come into a semi-sleep period where they may cry out or whimper a bit, but left to their own devices they go back to sleep very easily on their own.
He must be knackered too if he's up so much during the night?
At 8mo you don't have to worry that he needs night feeds, so don't feel that you are letting him go hungry if you don't go in and feed him.
I would have thought that at 8mo you are well and truly out of the danger zone for SIDS, so I'd ditch the monitor. He will let you know if he really wants you.

Exoect I'll be told I'm cruel,but I don't actually care anymore!

I turned the volume off and used the light on my monitor.. when the room lit up like a disco I would go in.... mind you they were in the next room.. its not like they were in the west wing or anything....

Turn it off. If he is in the room next to yours you will hear when he cries...

I never used the monitor upstairs as it magnifies every little murmur (It is used when we are downstairs and ds is upstairs so we can hear if he cries). We shut his door but leave ours open a little so that we hear him if he is crying properly but not so much if he is just whimpering/crying out in his sleep.

maybe you could try one night not responding to every waking and see if and how long it takes him to settle?

We moved our 27 week old into his own room about 10 days ago and discovered that he can resettle himself to sleep, usually in 10 minutes or so.

So he has now gone from up to four feeds between 11 and 5:30-6am to just one at 3am.

I use a monitor too, but turn it down if it goes off "too early," and then I can hear him anyway as his room is just next door.

Thanks everyone - I think I'll give it a go tonight. I know I'll hear him if he needs me but if he can settle himself without me, then I think that can only be a good thing for both of us. Wish me luck!!

good luck. i find it helps to be clear on your strategy in advance - like, decide how long you will give him to settle before going in. it's hard to make decisions in the middle of the night ...