baby not settling after night time feeds

[bessie26]

Hi,

We just started a new bedtime routine a week or so ago for my DD. She is 10 weeks old, but was 6 weeks prem, so in some ways is only 4 weeks old. I am feeding her every 3 hours & she is putting on weight nicely :-)

She seems to be loving the bedtime routine.
(feed at 5, bath & massage at 6:30, feed at 7, then gets swaddled & put into her moses basket) and wakes for another feed sometime between 10 and 12, and then goes back down again.

However, when I put her into her moses basket after her next feed, she starts crying... and usually continues until 6am :-(

She has suffered from bad night time wind in the past, and is currently on Colief, which is a faff to administer, but seems to do the trick.
We are trying the "crying down" method and allowing her to cry for 2 mins before attempting to settle her, generally with lots of shhhhing, holding her head & feet or stroking her cheek.

Does anyone have any other suggestions on how to re-settle her? My husband thinks she is bored in her cot & that he should take her downstairs for a change of scenery, but to me that seems to go against the bedtime thing we're trying to do.

all help gratefully recieved!

in my opinion too yopung to set a routine im afraid maybe for some it works but my ds was still feeding on demand every few hours and as he got older settled into his own routine

far to young to understand day or night routine and may need to be sat up for 10 mins after feed to help with tummy pains my ds had lots of problems and gp said to sit upright for 10 mins

as for the 2 mins controlled crying again too young may need to be upright having cuddles for a while

let the routine work itself out as she gets older dont try and forse one she's too young

sorry for typos ds climbing all over me

Have you tried holding her upright for 10-15 mins after her night feed? we had to do this with ds till he was about 12 weeks or he had real trouble with trapped burps and screamed, which made him swallow more air, so more need to burp... etc.

is she having a lot of daytime naps? She coulkd genuinely be bored and ready to start the day (not that I think you should encourage this!) I found chopping 10 mins off a daytime nap helped when DS tried to start the day early.

If she is one of those that doesn't usually need to cry to get off to sleep for her other sleeps, i have to say i wouldn't be inclined to leave her for even 2 mins. Could you settle her in your arms for this one sleep? DP and I are fairly religious about putting DS down awake, but for the night time feeds I hold him till he's asleep then pop him in the cot (also allows me to keep him upright for a while after the feed) once he's been asleep a few mins. Hasn't impacted on any of his settling at other naps!

Agree with bubblagirl

I had a 6 week prem 17 weeks ago. I prob won't be offering anything that useful - but with ours, she has never really cried too much in one long go but we did have a night time/day time confusion scenario that we are slowly getting turned around (I think NICU lights confuses them!)

We do quite a strict day time routine and tried to keep her awake after feeds(although apparently prem babies are often more sleepy and so until she was about 10 weeks ish this didn't really work!).

Have you/do you want to try a dummy? We find it really useful...but understand it's not for everyone...

People keep telling us it's early days, with a prem you get extra time of the really hard bit (and the bonus of having them out in the world to enjoy for longer - on the positive side!) so hang on in there! Already it's getting easier for us...hope you get more sleep soon!

IT'S INSANE AND UNKIND TO TRY AND PUT SUCH A TINY BABY INTO A ROUTINE.

thanks for all your replies!

we started feeding her every 3 hours (or more often if she wants) about a month ago under advice from our HV as she started to loose weight doing the pure "demand" feeding as she was asleep too much to demand enough!

we're also not being too rigid with the times for the nighttime routine, if she wants a feed at 4pm, we don't make her wait until 5pm!

i had been keeping her upright for 5-10 mins after each feed, but have now increased this to 15 as you suggested and we have had a good few nights without hours of crying and have just been awake for feeding & nappy changes

we have a vague "getting up" routine (top & tail and new clothes), but don't yet have any regular daytime naps, we just have them as and when she wants them or i think she needs them. I've been keeping a record of how much she's ben awake the last few days & it's been around 9-10hours, which according to my baby book is ok.

thanks again for your help!

Glad things are improving Bessie, and hope you manage to catch up on some sleep!

Moondog: what exactly is 'insane & unkind' about what Bessie is doing? Could you specify??? Having a bath... ooohh, how 'unkind'. And then massaging, feeding & swaddling... even unkinder . And leaving to cry for 2 mins, I shiver even with the thought.

BTW Moondog, I presume when you go to the toilet & your baby cries for 2 minutes you just jump right out (leaving whatever you were doing unfinished) & respond before the crying reaches the 2 mins mark...

Anyway. Sorry for being sarcastic but I find what you wrote really insensitive & actually rude.