out of ideas and starting to dislike my DD at night - awful

[MotherElk]

DD is 5 months old - she's got two teeth and is a fidget.

Although she's never been a good sleeper, she has definitely been better than her current situation. For a while she slept ok in her own room in her cot - took a while to settle her but then slept ok (2-3 hours) til she needed feeding.
I'm not sure what happened at about 4 months but it's all gone belly up... she might sleep for a bit in her cot at first but she ends up in bed with us, (she won't settle anywhere else) and after about half an hour she starts thrashing around and fidgeting and then does this all night. I've tried the four s's (shushing, swaying, swaddling and shaking lightly) and although that worked for a bit it doesn't any more... Swaddling sometimes works but not for long...
We've started weaning her but that hasn't helped.
I've tried cluster feeding her, even with formula and that hasn't helped.
What worries me is I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel and I can't see how I can do this for the next month let alone the next year. I love her so much in the day but it's like she's a different baby at night - HELPPPPPPPP

Have you tried pick up put down? I have heard it has good results (but can take quite a lot of persistance).
There is always controlled crying if you feel you can cope with doing it?

hi motherelk
my main advice for this it to try and persevere with her in her cot. i had this exact problem with my DD from about 5/6 months and it does eventually get better. you say she will settle in bed with you but after 1/2 an hour she starts to fidget etc in my eyes she is not settled. do you have a chair in her room where you can try to settle her? is her bedroom dark and cool? is there any background noise? maybe try and settle her to sleep in your bed and then move her to her cot when she is. she is too young to try pick up put down/controlled crying as these are only recommended for babies over 6 months at the earliest. i know how hard it is but try and remember it WILL get better good luck
xx ei xx

hi
I need to read a bit more on controlled crying i think - pudding25 can you tell me a bit more about pick up put down? I know it's mentioned elsewhere but not sure. will need to read more if we are to try it after 6 months.
i think you are right about persevering with the cot - last night she did the early part very nicely, it was the rest of the night that was a nightmare!! i think maybe i need to look at our sleep pattern overall - if i can get a nap in the day maybe i'm more prepared for the night?
I don't know!! Thanks for your suggestions x

does she nap in the day? I know once I got ds to do proper nap night times got better.

She sort of does and I've tried both giving her a proper nap and avoiding them altogether.... she definitely doesn't sleep as much as other babies i know!!
QueenEI I took on board your comment about settling her, and last night spent more time getting her settled - it was about 4 before she came into my bed, and before that she settled quite nicely in her cot...

This week isn't as hectic as the past few have been so am hoping for some routine to come back into our lives!

Thanks for all your comments, it's been appreciated and has definitely helped
keep em coming!
xx