15 months old and never slept all night (Yet)

[Ozzie]

My 15 month old goes to bed with no problem and sleeps until 3.00am when I usually give in with a bottle of milk. She may go back to sleep but sometimes she won't. I would love a full nights sleep and I don't feel that 7 hours is enough as she is very cranky in the morning until her nap. How do I get her out of this waking habit.

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Ozzie,
Don't have any advice to give, but just thought it might give you some comfort to know that you are not alone!!. My dd is just over two (!), and although she'll go for a few weeks sleeping right through, you can bet something will happen (a cold, or just a break from routine); and then we'll have a spell of waking up and screaming or (if I'm feeling weak)coming into our bed. At the moment she goes to bed fine, but wakes about three and comes in with us. Some days I worry about it, others I just accept it, and realise it won't last forever(!). The only thing I would say is that maybe you could try dropping the milk in the middle of the night. It's tough, but have you tried leaving your son/daughter to cry for a bit?. I do think this works, but only if you're feeling strong enough yourself, (which invariably I'm not). Sorry this is a bit warbling, and not very helpful, but it's always nice to know someone sympathises, and is going through something similar, but a little further down the line!.

If you really want her to sleep through, the milk has got to go IMO. Try reading Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems by Richard Ferber for ideas. Once you've stopped the night feeding, I think sleep will follow pretty quickly, though it may be quite hard for a short while. I really don't know how you've survived this long, honestly I don't. You are a heroine and a martyr!

I think when babies get a night bottle they just know to wake up automatically. Its just part of their routine even in their sleep. My ds still did it till about 5 or 6 months ago. Hes now 25 mos. Maybe if you work on stopping the bottle she will eventually forget about it.

I know its so hard when it comes down to that last bottle feeling each night but I'm sure in a short time shell be sleeping through or at least a little longer. Good luck

We had to drop the night time bottle before Dd would sleep through. As I am a softie I cut it by 1 oz a week. By the time we were down to 2 oz she couldn't be bothered to wake up for it, and has been a very good sleeper.
HTH

Aloha is absolutely right - Richard Ferbers book is THE sleep bible and the feed will ahve to go either gradually or not - if you can face a few hard nights of upset when he realises that the milk isn't coming then you will soon solve the problem. It isn't nice - but as you say he isn't happy at the moment as he isn't getting enough sleep - so this really IS being cruel to be kind
Good luck!

Try reading Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution if you want to read anything about sleep. She has read Ferber's book as she quotes bits from it but in a much easier to read format. She also has many different solutions to getting your baby to sleep. She isn't an advocate of CIO so her methods take time. I really enjoyed reading her book (hated Ferber's book) but haven't tried any of her techniques. Good luck.

Don't forget that even Ferber says that the nightmilk shouldn't be dropped suddenly; you got the child into the bad habit, it's only kind to drop the habit gradually. You're supposed to taper down (ie, 1st night, 8oz bottle , 2nd night: 7oz, 3rd night: 6 oz... etc.). He has similar guides for breastfeeders, in minutes not oz.

Ozzie, we were you about 20 months ago. DS had never slept through the night at 15 months and I was really fed up. Bought Richard Ferber and started to get a bit tough. Stopped the milk as it is definitely not hunger and with our ds there was no guarantee that he'd go back to sleep either. We had tried everything: co-sleeping, walking around, rocking, lullabies etc. etc. In the end we did controlled crying as per Richard Ferber. First night was fairly grim and it took DS an hour and a half to go back to sleep (that was about what he was usually up for anyway), the second night 40 mins and the third night 10 mins. Since that night, other than when he's been poorly he has slept through. He's just over 3 now.
I also have Elizabeth Pantley's book and would say that you have to have the patience of a saint to go with her methods. She is so softly, softly you could be there for another few months. Not for me, but obviously a good route for some people.
Good luck Ozzie.

I feel almost human again as I've had some sleep. dd has gone to 5.20am for 3 nights now had 6 oz of milk and then gone back till 7.30. Tonight I will reduce the amount of milk again and hopefully we will get a full nights sleep soon. It is reassuring to know that we are not alone.