Help - how to fit 10 month old's daytime naps around toddler's social life

[Nizzer]

Any advice very welcome. I have a 10mo DS and 3 year old DD. DD slept brilliantly day and night from 7 weeks without any encouragement or schedules being forced on her. So now it's payback time...

DS still doesn't sleep through and his night waking is inconsistent - e.g. can be up at 2am and refuse to sleep again until 4am, or can wake at 4.30 and go back to sleep with a little stroking. Milk will usually work to get him back to slep, but not always, and I try not to offer it unless knackered and/or it's late enough in the night to count as his 'morning milk' (anything after 5am!)

Have tried to establish a strictish daytime napping routine to see if that helps, but it only seems to work - and not always - unless he gets at least 2.5 hours sleep in the day and that sometimes feels impossible because of DD either being in the house and noisy with friends/toy piano/etc. or twice a week needing to go out (to swimming/ballet) mid-afternoon and so I end up having to wake DS to put him in the buggy to go out.

Have today decided to drop DS's 9am and 1pm naps in favour of a single nap starting at 11.30am on the basis that it's easier to give DS a longish sleep at that time. Anyone had experience of this sort of approach working? Or any other advice?

Started back at work two days a week last month so very keen to get my nights back...

He sounds very like my 11mo DS2. He has only started to sleep better at night (settling easily at 7pm and sleeping through until 5.30'ish) since we abandoned 2 naps a day. Now he'll sleep for about an hour in the morning in the buggy when we're out and about with DS1 but that's it until bedtime.

Until quite recently he would wake up in the night and stay awake for at least 2 hours as well as taking ages to settle at bedtime and for naps.

I'm doing the same thing with my 10 mo DS at the moment. He had started waking at 5am and not settling back to sleep. A few people suggested to me that I should drop his morning sleep so I've gone from 9am/2pm sleeps to one starting around 12 noon. I have also reinstated a dream feed at 11pm so try and eliminate hunger as a reason for his waking. Touch wood most nights it seems to be working - for the last 3 nights he's slept through until 7:30am which is absolute bliss. He does still wake at 5am but settles himself back to sleep.

Thank you both - its good to know that I am not alone, and that there might be light at the end of the tunnel. I might try the dream feed option too.