4 week old won't sleep in crib, what do I do?

[Stephano]

ever since coming home from the hospital, my 4 week old hasn't slept in her crib for longer than 15 mins. At night she sleeps in our bed but only on a pillow next to my side so i can breast feed her and she falls asleep, as do I. I would like her to sleep in the moses basket as i am concerned that i may smother her or she will get too hot and the risk of her being harmed increases because of this. What can i do to get her to sleep in her crib? is she too young to do controlled crying or the crying down method? Any thoughts would be appreciated.

Waaaay too young for controlled crying.
She wants to be near you after being in you for so long.

Co-sleeping makes b/feeding much easier and is says as long as you and your partner not drinking.taking drugs/smoking.

listen to moondog. she is wise.

Agree, straight into bed with you! Anything else is second best and you won't crush her...millions of us do it with no ill effects at all!

DD and most of my friends' LOs were the same. In the end I researched how to co-sleep safely and found evidence that if you take all of the suggested precautions, the incidence rate of SIDS is considerably lower than if your LO was in a cot. The reason we are all told to ensure that LO sleeps in a cot is because too many people don't co-sleep safely. I'm hoping that the advice will change soon so that people are aware of the actual research and can make up their own minds.

If you really don't want to co-sleep you could try 'wearing' a muslin down your top and then placing it between the sheet and the mattress in the crib at bedtime so that your LO can still smell you. You could also try letting your LO spend some awake time in the crib when they are happy and you are playing with them so that they have a happier association with the crib. If you hold your LO in your arms after feeding them, you may need to hold them for at least 20 minutes before gently placing them in the crib so that they are in a stage of deep sleep - watch for signs of deep sleep ie limbs go limp, face stops moving and breathing changes. You could also try putting your LO into a cot. Some babies prefer to be in a cot especially if it means they can see you through the bars or if they are a baby who flails their arms and needs the space to do that so they don't wake up.

I am by no means a sleep expert and am still having fun with DD at night time. But, take heart, my DD used to be exactly the same and can now sleep for 9.5 hours straight in her cot (doesn't always do that though!). Looking back, I know that DD was particularly bad at going to sleep in her moses basket when she was having a growth spurt and wanted easy access to the breast. Next time, I'm not going to pretend that I don't co-sleep at all and will take all the necessary precautions to ensure that if I do fall asleep feeding DC2, I won't wake up in a panic because I will know that they are safe!

If you decide not to co sleep, continue to put baby to bed when ever asleep, over time baby will sleep for longer times. Do you swaddle - most of my babies have been swaddled up to six weeks or so it makes them feel nice and secure. Also if the moses basket can be rocked that may help, so when baby wakes then rock baby back to sleep - that is of course baby is not waking because of dirty nappy or is hungry.

get a cot that has a removeable side and is the same height as your bed. put it next to the bed. you should be able to gradually move them over to it and they will get comfy with it.

my DS goes in his crib in the evening and then comes in with us for second night feed until i have had enough sleep. he gets much more sleep this way and so do i. he loves to snuggle up in the mornings. the look on his face is pure bliss.

Thanks for the advice all. Feel a bit more reassured. I'm probably being too impatient and worrying for nothing. I don't swaddle as she seems to not like it but I will try the muslin aproach. My main concern is that she won't even sleep in our bed on the mattress but on a pillow next to my side as I can't do the traditional front on feeding position. I do the rugby ball hold. I can't lie on my side either to feed her as she doesn't latch on due to my boobs and nipple position.
I love having her in the bed with me but just want to make sure that she is safe. I also want to make sure that I'm not making a rod for my own back and will never be able to sleep in a more comfortable position myself.

please don't worry about this, I wish I had just kept my baby in bed with me when he was this age. 4 weeks is still so tiny, they just want to be with you!

i found DS and i could not master bf when lying down when he was 4 weeks. he is 9 weeks now and we are doing it really well. I think now that he has a lot more control of his neck muscles he can latch so much better.

just keep trying and one day you will be surprised. My DS can now find and latch a nipple on his own which gives me a bit more sleep.

my DS also adored sleeping on a pillow for a couple of weeks after coming home but he has outgrown it now but is very happy to co-sleep.

Thanks again. I'll persevere with it. Had a great sleep last night. I'm just worried about her weight now as she seems not to be putting on much, but that's another thread.