What are your 4 year old bedtime routines?

[Amiayoungmumthough]

My 4 year old daughter has issues with sleeping alone. Always has, we've tried everything. Most nights go like this.
7pm bath
7:30pm Jammies and quiet time
8pm into bed and read a bedtime story
I then say goodnight leave the room for a few minutes and tell her I'll be back in a minute.
I go back and usually she's still awake so I respect the 'goodnight I'll be back in a few minutes to check on you' until she's asleep.
This usually lasts until about 9pm sometimes later.
Then she will wake between 12-3 and come through to our room and get into our bed for the rest of the night.
I did try getting up and putting her back to her bed for a full 2 weeks recently. It did not go well she cries and shouts for up to an hour the falls asleep for a while then repeats, even if I'm going in every few minutes to reassure her. We have neighbours now so we couldn't continue with that and no one was getting enough sleep.

Any suggestions? And how long are your bedtime routines with your 4 year olds?

All replies are appreciated ❤️

Could she sleep in your room?

I have a 3.5 and a 5 yr old, they go to bed at the same time. So bath/wash, Pjs, stories on my bed (where we can all lay down). Toilet. Bed. Both go and get in bed, I have a couple of minutes cuddle and chat with 5yr old, then go to 3 yr old who likes to stroke my hand. Couple of minutes of That then a cuddle, kiss and night night etc for both. They have a music/light thibg on which they had as babies and still like to have. Then I go and lay on my bed for 10 minutes, by which time theyre asleep. It has taken sone effort to get to this stage (used to sit in with them til they fell asleep.)

THEN..... 3 yr old will come and get in bed with me at some point in the night. I do sometimes carry him.back but honestly, I usually can't be bothered, he lays down and goes to sleep. It is just me though and has been since "D" H left 3 yrs ago.

5 yr old stays in bed all night. Funnily enough he was the "worse" sleeper as a baby.

Bath at 6:45, milk and story around 7, toilet and teeth, goodnight at around 7:15.
He sometimes stays awake and chats to himself or 'reads' his books but always asleep by 8.

5yr old dd's bedtime routine.
7pm bath and Jammies
7.30 In bed, read a quick story lights out.
8pm dd back downstairs because she forgot to tell me something important.
8.15 dd back downstairs because she forgot to tell DH something important.
8.30 Dd can be heard running around the room playing with bloody toys. At this point I go back upstairs put her back into bed at this point she remembers something else that she needs to tell me.
This usually carries on for 1hr until I've lost the bloody plot.
To be fair she's much better since she started school in August.

We do 7pm upstairs, bath, read two books together then turn on night light and she listens to a Audio book until she drifts off. It usually takes her about 15 mins to fall asleep, I stay in her room silent until I'm sure she's asleep. I've tried leaving she just gets terribly upset and it's not worth it. I used to have to do the same with my eldest but now they are older they will let me leave as long as we have had a good 20 min chat first!

5 dinner, play until bath at 6. Reading books in bed until 7. Dh cuddles him in bed until he falls asleep them comes down for dinner at 7:30. Works well for us and ds!

DS turns 4 in a few weeks. At 7 he puts pyjamas on, has a drink of milk, then teeth, we both get in his be for a story, then light off and cuddles until he's asleep (10-15 minutes). Then I sneak out. Usually finished by 7.30.

He'll sleep through about 75% of the time, but has recently stopped wearing nappies for bed, and will sometimes wet the bed, or sometimes his 1yo sister will cry and wake him. If he's up I'll lie down with him again until he goes back to sleep (after stripping of wet sheets, I have a second sheet under the mattress protector so only takes a minute). Sometimes I can sneak out again after half an hour or so, but quite often I fall asleep, then wake up and leave next time I hear the baby.

THANK YOU ALL!
I was looking for some sort of magical life hack I guess, but from reading these I think I can accept that it's not going to be perfect and if she needs to come into our bed then so be it, she'll eventually grow out of it.
Thank you all again❤️