My 14 month old is terrible at naptime and bedtime - takes ages to settle and then wakes up after 30 min anyway.
I wanted to try the gradual retreat method and so far I’ve progressed from him lolloping all over me in my bed at sleep time, to sitting next to his cot with one or both arms through the bars, holding his hand. How do I move on to the next step?! If I try and withdraw my hand, he just sits up, or cries.
I wouldn’t mind continuing to hold his hand as he falls asleep but at the moment he take anywhere from 15 minutes to 2 hours to fall asleep and it’s got to the point where my 4 year old is spending hours watching TV on his own in the living room every day while I settle his little brother down for naps 
Something has to change - please help!