Any suggestions (baby won't settle in crib)

[Chelle2289]

So I know I've already posted about cluster feed etc etc, and she has been a little better i.e. Sleeping for 6 hours last night!

But really struggling tonight as she's been on my breasts from about 6pm on and off but whenever I try put her down to sleep she wakes up not long after screaming and can only calm her by feeding again.

I'm exhausted, this is day 11. I know I know it will get better but for now any suggestions on getting her down for even a hour would be most appreciated x

Mine slept on top of me. As I had a c section there was 0 chance of me turning over. I was her mattress for two months or so. Not sure if this helps, but it will pass once she gains a bit of weight, it's still the early days.
And I know how it feels, mine was very similar to yours at that age.

Try winding her before you put her down, or putting some gentle music on quietly. It will pass, in the meantime take/ask for any help you can get. White noise is also supposed to work for some and sometimes clapping softly will distract them for a bit.

There were free white music apps but remember to be kind to yourself OP it's the first thing we forget when we become mothers and just do whatever you need to do to get through the newborn stage.

White noise! Not white music

Look up safe cosleeping. ISIS and lullaby trust are good sites.
As long as you follow all the guidance it is no less safe than usual. If might give you a much needed rest during cluster feeding (and remember this doesn't last forever!) xxx

Got that euan the sheep and doesn't settle her. She just literally wants to sleep in our arms.

Feel too nervous for co-sleeping
Tried swaddling.
Just don't know what else to try lol

She's still up and been like this since 6pm

Mine both cluster fed every night for months. It's normal and it's great when they do settle for the night you get 4 + hours.

My suggestions though would be maybe feed for 20+ minutes on each side to ensure baby gets hind milk as well as the fire milk. Fore milk is watery and won't satisfy them for long whereas hind milk is thicker and creamier so takes longer for them to digest.
Also if needs must hop into bed and feed lying down and cosleep (safely..read guidelines).
I always changed nappies before a feed then didn't change again until before next feed unless I heard them exploding! No need to wake them up to change after a feed as they of course will only need to feed again to settle.
It's hard going but well worth it if it's working. Congrats on your new baby. Take each day at a time. Breast feeding does get easier and they do usually settle more from 6 weeks on. X

It's literally just that she won't go in her cot lil bugger

www.isisonline.org.uk

Lots of safe co-sleeping stuff here. It will get better; if nothing else, your body adjusts to how much sleep it needs! But remember, 11 days ago they were surrounded in fluid, listening to your heart. Some babies are fine at being put down. Some babies (DS1, I'm looking at you...!) never are.

At three weeks they are still very much in need of being with you a lot.
I get though that this is exhausting.
Things that worked for me:
White noise - the best app for me is sound sleeper.
Sleepy head/toddle pod. Toddle pod is cheaper. And makes them feel safe although it's not for unsupervised sleeping.
Your item of clothing in the cot but make sure it's tucked in tightly. I used to use my nightie as a sheet so DD had a familiar smell in the cot. It cannot be loose though!
Hot water bottle in the bed for a bit before you put them down (may be too hot for them now) but used to work a treat as being removed from a warm boob into cold bed used to wake up DD. Warming the bed up made the transition easier

Tried swaddling

What happened when you tried swaddling?

Is baby back to birth weight and gaining?

Are you winding baby after feeds?

DD2 was like this. Some babies just hate being put down. I got a sling for the daytime and had to co-sleep at night, though I didn't want to originally. There is only so long you can get by with not sleeping though! She doesn't sound like she is doing badly though. DD2 didn't sleep 6 hours straight until she was about 4!

My DS wouldn't go longer than an hour in his crib until 4 weeks. Do you have a sleepyhead? It was a lifesaver!

she won't go in her cot lil bugger

Read up about the 4th trimester. The basics:

1 - all human babies are born 3 months premature.
2 - newborns crave what they had in the womb, so not lying flat on their backs on their own (they're held tightly in your tummy), fed on demand, hearing your heartbeat and breathing constantly etc

You're still establishing breast feeding at this point, plus there is a growth spurt around 2 weeks. You need to just do what your baby needs you to do. Sleep whenever you can and eat well to get through it.

Could your DP take her for a few hours in the night between feeds so you get some sleep and she sleeps on them?

At that age my dc didn't really settle in their cots slept a lot on me or DH. Friend of mine used one of those co-sleeper cots, side drops down so they are right up against the bed and close to you but not actually in your bed. She swears by it.

But really at this age feeding lots is normal. If you want to there is nothing with introducing the odd bottle. With DD we did this now and again. I'd feed her about 11 then hand her to DH to settle/ let sleep on him. I'd go to bed as would they then next time she woke for a feed DH would give her a bottle of expressed milk meaning I'd get a solid block of 4/5 hours before feeding again ( at that age she feed every two hours)

This will pass and you will sleep and she'll settle to sleep in her cot too.

Sorry but I think your expectations are very unrealistic. Very few babies will just lay down alone for long and that's totally ok. It is difficult but I think you'd feel better if you managed your expectations, as above research 4th trimester. Your baby is doing nothing wrong, though society may have you thinking otherwise