What to do? Frequent night waking 11 month old.

[SturdyAngel]

Just wondering if anyone had any advice for me.

My ds is 11 months, breast fed and still wakes many times through the night. I usually feed him and put him back into his cot the first couple of times he wakes (before I go to bed) then after that I put him into bed with me and let him feed while I sleep!

I do like co sleeping but as my 3yo ds1 also tends to wake and get in my bed my poor dh usually gets pushed out (despite it being a super king size bed!!) and he goes to sleep in ds1's bed.

I am wondering whether I should try and do something about the frequent waking or just carry on feeding him everytime to wakes and let him grow out of it naturally. I am very tired and haven't had a decent nights sleep in years as ds1 has never slept through either but am prepared to continue as I am, failing any ideas to help! I'm not keen on CC and as ds2's cot is in our room don't think it would work too well anyway!
TIA

This sounds so familiar to me, I am blessed with two beautiful, happy boys but when it comes to sleeping they are both up and down all night and as you say in nearly 3 yrs have never had more than a 3-4 hour stretch, if we're lucky.

I still B/f both mine, eldest is 2.75 yrs and the youngest is 15mths. Would you maybe put the cot into your eldest son's room and let them share? Our 2 seem to settle a bit better by sharing their bedtime and we don't tend to disturb them as much as when DS2 was in our room. Having said that though he shares our bed most nights from around 12-1 am! and as you say DS1 joins in if he gets disturbed by his little brother.
I often still feed my youngest 3 times a night but when he wakes my DH often goes and gives him a cuddle to see if he can settle him before I give him a feed as he certainly is'nt hungry.

We are unable to go down the CC route as it breaks my heart just thinking about it. I feel unable to offer anything constructive really. Except I understand the waeriness and utter faitigue you must be feeling. it is so hard to keep going especially with 2 all day and then what seems all night. My DH and me often sit down and have a chat about this when it all seems too much and that something has to change and we decide on small changes that we can stick too and implement to see if things improve. I believe that gradually their sleeping is improving with time but ultimately i know that they feel loved and that all too quickly they'll have grown up. We just try to be very relaxed about bedtimes and our sleeping.

About 3 weeks ago we introduced a sticker chart for DS1, which he made, he picks a sticker if he sleeps all night in his bed and once he collects 5 he recieves a small pressy (normally from the £1 shop), this has helped a little but we've been very careful not to overdo it as we want him to feel able to come into our room if wants too.

With 2 young ones as well, there is a never ending list of teething issues or a cold or the odd night terror and when its not one its the other!!!

Thanks for your post yummy- your situation sounds so similar to mine!

We tried putting ds2 in ds1's room but that made the situation worse, they constantly woke each other. Bed time was a nightmare and we ended up putting ds2 down in our bed- where he stayed all night despite best intentions to move him into cot! DS2 has got his own room-sort of- its in the middle of being built. I am hoping he will sleep better in his own room, can't wait until its finished!!

I also tried a sticker chart with ds1, it did help but as I'm so tired I sometimes don't wake when he gets in with me, and even if I do I can't be bothered with trying to get him back in his room as inevitably this wakes ds2!

It would help if they woke a bit later in the morning but ds1 likes nothing more than to wake us all up at 4.30am!! Long day when you're up at this time!!

Nice to know I'm not alone!

I shouldn't laugh but if not I'd cry! My DH has been reading this thread and when we think back it was a nightmare when we put them in the same room for about 2 weeks and then it settled down- well as much as it ever seems to for my boys! Hope the new room will help.

Your DS1 sounds soooo like mine. He often runs in between 3-4am shouting 'good morning mummy, good morning daddy, time to get up!' after numerous protests from us we say, well its dark therefore its still sleep time so he proudly gets his stool and turns the light on, shouting loudly that it is now light and we can get up and all play downstairs!!!

i think one of the hardest things is that none of my friends really believe me when i say that we've been up and down all night, every night, week after week, month after month etc. etc. and I love my boys so much, they are such fun I genuinely love being a mummy but being so tired is such hard work, as well you know.

Your situation has made me smile and thankful that we're not alone. Just sorry I had no pearls of wisdom!!! If you do hear of any...........