13 month old still won't sleep through

[lyssie29]

Hi my 13 month old wakes at least 3-4 times a night. She wakes crying and inconsolable until I give her a bottle with some milk in. She drinks a little of it and then will put her dummy in and go sleep. She doesn't have a bottle through the day now but I can't stop her having it through the night. She goes to bed fine without it but when she wakes through the night she is really upset. What can I do? I'm a single mum so this is 7 days a week and I'm exhausted. Then my 3 year old is up between 5.30 -6am.

That sounds really tough The combination of multiple night-wakings and early starts is an absolute killer, and you're a hero for coping with it all on your own.

Do you have family or anyone who could have your 3 year-old to stay with them for a couple of nights while you work on the baby's sleep? You probably know this, but you need to get her off the bottle at night. You can either do this cold turkey or by watering it down and/or reducing the amount gradually. Do you have a helpful health visitor who could help you come up with a plan and, more importantly, reassure you that your 13 month-old does not need milk at night?

All the health visitor said to me at her 1 year check was to try and reduce her bottles. It's not formula it's just whole milk. I've tried swapping for water which just makes her cry even more and tried just to keep giving her her dummy but she will just throw it across the room and continue crying. I don't know how to do it other than going cold turkey really as if she drinks it all and wakes again she'll just scream until I get more. I don't know why she does it as for her naps through the day and at bedtime she happily takes her dummy. I don't have anyone to take my 3 year old. They have no grandparents there's only me.

What about giving her a non-spill braker of milk that is left in her cot? She can help herself then.

I've been night weaning my toddler for months (I got a job part way through so had to pause things for a while so as not to rock the boat) She is very attached to the comfort of her bottles although she has a dummy too, and it got worse after illness, when she was drinking milk round the clock.

I started by reducing the amount she had by 30ml. I think you are supposed to reduce by that much every night really but I took it very slow. I thought she would notice and ask for more but she didn't. She was having 180ml twice a night at the start. I would reduce each bottle by 30ml each week or less if I felt confident about it. As I say we'd got to 120ml when I started working evenings so I left it at that for a long while. Recently started again and now down to 80ml but I started watering it down too so it was 60ml milk plus 30ml water. Just trying to make it a bit less enjoyable for her in the hope she'll stop waking up for it! I got chicken about reducing to 60ml so that's why we're on 80 now tbh!! I will try 60 soon. Worth a go. Mine no longer asks for milk on every waking usually just has one bottle of her watered 80ml so way less than she was on. One night this week she didn't ask for any at all. Hope that helps.