Recommend a gradual retreat book....

[Sparrowlegs248]

Or answer these questions please!

Ds is 1. Bf to sleep is becoming unreliable, starting to cuddle to sleep but for the first bit, I have to kind of pin him to me. He cries and struggles then settles in after about 30 seconds. He might have a couple more shorter cries.

If I'm.doing gw, and he's in his cot, what do I do when he stands and walks, bounces around it for ages?

What if he does proper crying, as opposed to tired crying? Pick him up?

We co sleep after the early hours feed. Is it OK to just start with self settling at bedtime or should I do through the night too?

Hi Nottalotta,

I can't recommend a book unfortunately but just wanted to bump your post.

If it helps I focused just on bedtime for ages as DS took so long to SS for naps and he just couldn't get himself back to sleep in the early hours. Once SS for BT was really established it is like he had cracked it and now he is mostly down to 1 nap a day he will just get himself to sleep. So I think playing it easy and just sleep training for bedtime would be fine. I have also found that since he started getting used to settling himself properly without fuss( just past a month really) I now hear him wake briefly at his old 5.30 wake up time and he will get himself back to sleep after which he wakes between 6.30 and 7.30, bliss. So I would sleep train for bedtime only and then hope the rest falls into place. It did with my DS. Trust me it is a skill worth teaching. I didn't with DD and now at 6yo she still needs me to lie next to her in bed.

However, as I remember you are expecting another so I may be inclined to focus on seeing if he will SS for that early waking, if he doesn't naturally in a month or so,after you have cracked BTs, otherwise it may be tough once the next LO has arrived.

And for the record. My DS went through a phase of standing up in his cot , but not crying, so I would not go in and pick him up but leave him to wind down. He soon lay down and got on with it. However, if he did cry on the odd occasion i would go in and lie him down, sing a quick lullaby and then walk out. He never stands up now. You could try walk in, walk out if he starts crying stressfully, see if that works.

I think the fact that your DS will settle in your arms within 30 seconds is amazing. Just put him down and have faith, try a bit of walk in, walk out. However I have an inclin that your major worry is dealing with the early morning WU and your new arrival. But baby steps, should work out once BT is sorted x x

Thanks for your reply fifi. I really want to get started with this but worried that I'm a bit in the dark with it. My preference was to do bedtimes, and the rest will follow on. Hopefully..... Yes the early morning is getting to be a shocker, and I'd like it to be sorted before the next one arrives but bedtime seems the easier starting point.

Thanks again. I really am grateful for your advice.

I've started. Last night was easier, it's gone on a bit tonight. No screaming but about ten almost asleeps then bouncing back up.

Not sure if I am aiming at him falling asleep quicker, or just with out me there?