Hi im new to this but can anyone help me!!!

[GIBSON9]

my dd is 7 weeks old but i already have two and a half year old who goes to bed at six and up at eight the next morning, what a shock it was having a newborn you really do forget how tired and draining it all is.
Anyway does anyone else have there 7wk old in a routing,eg putting in cot in day, my dd hardly sleeps in the day, i put her to bed at six and she nearly always wakes up an hour later with wind so i have to give her more milk so that she will settle , normally she then sleeps for about five hours ,and then every four but it does not seem to be getting longer between feeds , and as for putting her down awake, she wont have it do you think she is too little for the controlled crying!!!
Help sleep deprived mum,

I personally wouldn't do controlled crying.

She is telling you something, have you heard of the EASY routine a baby eats, has activity and then sleeps, the Y is you time.

It is by the baby whisperer-Tracy Hogg, she has great plans that are rotuines not time schedules so can be adjusted as baby grows.

Hi there thanks for reply, tonight i put her down at six ,after a bottle, tried to burp her but she wouldnt then as predicted woke up at 7 and did a loud burp, tried to resist feeding her to sleep and left her in the cot with my hand on he chest til she fell asleep. i have read tracey hogg, the part i find difficult is the activity after feed, my dd is using the bottle as a cue for sleep,
Thank for reply

If she falls asleep do you get her a little awake before you put her to bed?

If babies i care for nod off from bottle or breast i then disturb them a little by touching hair, playing with hands and for the stubborn ones washing face, changing nappy so they are aware of the change of venue and then settle to sleep, it doesn't have to be long just have her aware enough to know she is in her cot each time.

This is encouraging her to self settle which will help her to settle in the day awake in her cot.

I agree, EASY works a charm!

Hi, I have an 8wk old & a 2.5yr old so can sympathise, however DS1 is in the habit of waking in the night as well

DS2 is in a good little routine by day and will go to his cot awake and sleep, however nightime is a different story. Feeds to sleep, then wakes up after about 10mins is then impossible to settle. Once settled he sleeps for 4-5hrs, then another 3hrs then 1hr!! Like you am concerned that the length of sleep is not getting any longer, however the mums on here reassure me that by 12wks things will settle down so am hopeful.

It is a shock having a newborn again but even more so when DS1 went through the night from 5wks.

Am going to be posting my own thread in a minute as DS2 impossible to settle at night.

MatNanplus, can you explain something for me..? (sorry to steal your thread - but maybe this might answer your query a bit more too ?....) .My ds won't self settle without a prop (a dummy at the moment). We resorted to that when he started to work himself into a frenzy fighting sleep and eventually being so hysterical nothing would work (when off in sleep, he will usually sleep for a good period of time). I've tried putting him down as soon as the sleepy signs are showing ie yawning (catch him on the first one), eye rubbing etc....all that happens then though is that he remains awake and starts to get in a frenzy - he doesn't drop off on his own at all and starts to fuss and fret and then the screaming starts. He's 6 weeks old now - during the day I get him to nap morning lunch and afternoon and feed at allotted times which seem to suit him fine but all naps are wherever I can get him to nap. He won't settle for 7pm without the dummy being in and me watching over him until it drops out (he screams when it falls out before he's ready for it to fall out)....I think the Baby Whisperer makes sense in theory if only I could put it into practice !!
Many thanks

Dibley30

Do you wind down in the bedroom with a story and him swaddled?

Have his dummy on stand by but not where he can see it.

Then as he shows more interest in falling asleep pop him into his cot saying "it's sleepy time" or such like?

Does he use the dummy during day naps?

Does he use it when awake?

I know Tracy doesn't use PU/PD for younger than 4m but i do it with babies from day one as i believe a lot of their shouting is reasurance that tho you have moved out of sight that you will return if you are needed, i have found this will happen several times in the early days and then infrequently there after, i always respond to a babies call unless they are doing the grumble and pause type of talking prior to nodding off.

Does this help?

GIBSON9

How was last night?

In Australia, they say you can use controlled crying from 6 weeks onwards, but in England they say minimum age is 6 months. You could try controlled comforting which I found helped teach my 10 week old son to settle himself to sleep after weeks of not sleeping at all during the day. You swaddle them and put them in their cot on their side, facing away from you. One hand on their shoulder so they can't make eye contact with you, other hand patting their back. If still yelling after 15 minutes (or less if you can't last that long!), you pick them up and calm them down, then start over again and keep repeating until they go to sleep. You still follow their lead and look for tired signs so not sure if it would help to get a baby into a particular routine.

Thanks for that advice.

Um, well I swaddle after bath and during wind down so we don't have that faff just as he's getting sleepy- sorry to be dim but when you say "story" - what would you mean for a 6 - 7 week old ? So, I don't think I do that bit at the moment but if you can suggest something, I'm open to it !

I would try the pu/pd - if you think it might work - he is definitely the clingy - separation is difficult type and I think we are getting to the stage where he is beginning to know what goes on and as I'm so tired I keep giving in to the dummy option (although he needs re-settling with it 45 mins into a longer sleep - so sleep associations seem to be just starting !) I thought he had colic but I'm now not so sure - he does get quite a bit of wind, but I know if that's causing him problems and it is getting less as he's getting bigger.
I'm increasingly using the dummy for daytime naps as I'm finding it more and more difficult to settle him at home (less so if in the buggy or in the car seat) . He also gets fussy after about an hour awake after feeding so that would appear to be his tired window. That means though that he would probably nap for about 5 and a half hours during the day (1halfhours morniing afternoon and 2 half at lunch) if we start the day by 7ish- does that sound too much/not enough ? I think you probably have to take each baby individually for that one though ?
Thanks for that !

Dibley30

By story i chat to baby in a calm monotone vioice as she winds down.

I would ditch the dummy as it sounds like he is starting to rely on it and that could mean lots of wakings to put it back in, he will be 9m+ before he can do it himself!

I would do the PU/PD, it will take time but does show results and if you can be consistant and stay with in the routine timings he will soon settle quicker and for longer, read that section in the book and then draw a time line and add to it feed times then do a little activity till you see the first signs, have a quiet wind down as you swaddle him and then settle for nap, maybe patting him in the beginning until he is settled and wait till he then falls asleep without any patting, if he fusses then pat again till he is calm, it could take time but each nap time it will take less settling time, but as she says, stay on track with feedings and the rest will fall into place.

HTH

You can always email me at [email protected]

Dunno if this will make things worse or better,I can totally sympathise as I could have posted this several months ago.It is so hard with a toddler and new baby.My ds was a great sleeper so dd was a total shock.She eventually settled down at 6 months but dont groan as she also had undiagnosed reflux so it took a long time.All I can say is that although its a nightmare it does get better.Seven weeks is still very little.The only advice is to try to establish a bedtime routine as suggested.Its so hard though will never have any more!!Am sending you big hugs as I remember vividly how awful it is.IT WILL GET BETTER EVENTUALLY.ps Dont feel guilty about letting the toddler watch tv.CBeebies and mumsnet were my salvation.(Felt like strangling cbeebies presenters by the end of it though!!!!!)Anything to get through the day I felt,and would have given a million quid for some sleep!!!Accept ANY help and sod the housework if you can stand it.Sleep at any opportunity!!!

Thankyou you all so much for your comments, ihave only just had chance to log on for a few days,
Over the past few days we were putting her down for between six and seven, after making sure we burped her first, still holding her til she nearly falls asleep the carrying her upstairs, she then sleeps for five or six hours has a feed between twelve and one the sleeps til about six, tried the dream feed but this semmed to set her up for waking every three hours and it seemed so criminal to wake her when she was sleeping so soundly.
In the day i am so busy running round taking my DS to playgroup and going to the gym i have no set routing and never in to put her in the cot, so she hardly sleeps at all in the day.
She is now eight weeks old and weighs over 13lb so hopefully the night feeds will get longer.
Thanks again for all your feedback