Self Stimulation During Sex

[NickiNackyDo]

Dear All,

Since having children I really struggle to orgasm through penetrative sex. My partner takes lots of time with foreplay to get me ready. However, I can get really close but just not over the line with PIV sex. I need some clitoral stimulation in addition to PIV .

My partner wants me to orgasm before he enters so he knows I'm happy. However, I get really over-sensitive after this and don't like it. Has anyone found a way to overcome this?

My partner will use his hands or a toy on my clit during sex and this is great. However, it is difficult in some positions, and I can see it means he doesn't focus on himself as much as he just can't multitask! He has politely suggested I use toys and fingers on myself during sex but I'm worried this is a bit pornstar which is just not me.

Is it quite common for ladies to self-stimulate during sex? If so - with what? Has anyone found a great solution to my problem?

... I can get really close but just not over the line with PIV sex. I need some clitoral stimulation in addition to PIV .
Not at all unusual.

My partner wants me to orgasm before he enters so he knows I'm happy. However, I get really over-sensitive after this ...
"The term"women come first" is very much a suggestion to make parters think. But it is not the law! If you will react better with more stimulation after penetration, then go for what works for you. NB: No mention of him giving you oral????

He has politely suggested I use toys and fingers on myself during sex but I'm worried this is a bit pornstar which is just not me.
Don't worry if you think something is a bit "pornstar", we are talking about passion here. Do what makes you feel nice.

I would say that it doesn't have to make you appear like a porn star. It's more about how you do it rather than what you are doing. My wife does it now and again, if she wants to. It doesn't appear over the top to me.

I don't, but I orgasm internally during sex rather than clitorally. I haven't always been like this, it's something I developed over time. This is more likely to happen faster if I have came clitorally beforehand. I sometimes feel oversensitive but sometimes if I push through that, that's when I get the really intense " inside" orgasms that feel like an explosion. Waiting a few minutes might help.
You shouldn't worry about what you look like, just go with what feels good for you. I think that women should always prioritise their own pleasure because we pulled the short straw when it comes to ease of orgasm during intercourse and it's easier for most men

I've only ever been able to orgasm through either fingers or clit stim. I use a Lelo sonic vibrator, which we call the hoover - it's a clit stim that on it's own doesn't do a lot for me (just a personal thing, loads of women do), but I use it during sex so that I can cum during sex. Best for me is doggy style so I can hold the vibe, they usually go nice and gentle until I've cum, then I throw it away and crack on. I love the feeling of orgasming during sex, but this is the only way that works for me

I have always found it difficult to get an orgasm from penetration. I have always rubbed my own clitoris while being penetrated so as to bring myself off. It is easier to finger yourself if you are doing spooning, doggy or cowgirl. I am not aware there is anything porn like about it - it is just my way of getting an orgasm during sex.

Have you thought about trying a c*ck ring with a clitoral stimulator bit?
Means you get some extra clit stimulation hands free?
I have same difficulty of climax during penetration only and I've recently tried one of these and its ace!