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Sex

Sex in a tent?

22 replies

fitofthegiggles · 07/08/2023 14:46

A light-hearted one for holiday time.

Going camping for a week - yes, we're mad with the weather at the moment but here's hoping... It's been a little while since DP and I have been under canvas. We've got a double sleeping bag so we'll be snug enough. 

Sex may/may not happen. If not, it's not really a problem as we're quite regular at home. But if it does, does anyone have advice, funny stories, pitfalls (maybe literally!) to avoid? 

OP posts:
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overdalexx · 07/08/2023 15:01

usual one of checking no silhouette shadow shows if dark.

plus

If light/breakfast time:

only have woman's head outside tent if campsite near empty

be wary of camp attendant popping round to collect last night's camping fee.

the way some campsights are, er, rammed, these days, often not hard for folk to figure out what you are up to.

all my sex has been in small dome tents - you maybe have something more palatial/protected.

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lizziebee90 · 07/08/2023 16:56
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Anotherbloke1 · 07/08/2023 20:33

We have sex every time when camping. Kids not near us to notice if they wake up (we can keep quiet) just make sure no lights on. Many yes ago when backpacking I woke up to tent next to me proper going for it, when I got out of tent theirs was literally rocking as she was riding him like he was a bull, her body was back and forth against the tent wall. Every one else camping had come to see by this point. Once the show was over I think they realised they had a audience and where v sheepish went coming out 🤣

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Stravaig · 07/08/2023 23:06

Always remember this. You might feel as if you are snug and secluded and in a private space, but there are other people just a few feet and two flimsy layers of fabric away. Everyone around you can hear absolutely everything; and if there is even the dimmest light, they can see everything too, in silhouette.

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Shutuptrevor · 07/08/2023 23:17

Daytime sex is the way forward when camping- much more noise to cover you and no worrying about light and shadows etc. Just obviously send any kids on a long errand 😂

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Shutuptrevor · 07/08/2023 23:18

“only have woman's head outside tent if campsite near empty”

@overdalexx i have no idea what this means, am i being really thick??

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QuaversAndRedbull · 07/08/2023 23:52

Shutuptrevor · 07/08/2023 23:18

“only have woman's head outside tent if campsite near empty”

@overdalexx i have no idea what this means, am i being really thick??

I'm pleased you asked because I didn't understand why any body part should be outside the tent for sex.

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B1rd · 08/08/2023 07:18

Do not keep the lights on!

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overdalexx · 08/08/2023 10:26

Shutuptrevor · 07/08/2023 23:18

“only have woman's head outside tent if campsite near empty”

@overdalexx i have no idea what this means, am i being really thick??

quite possibly - a camping memory of mine - more detail available if you insist.

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fitofthegiggles · 08/08/2023 15:19

Thanks all. All practical advice much appreciated! We're heading off shortly. 

We mastered The Art of the Silent Bonk many years ago but it's not been required in more recent times. We may have to refresh our memories if/when necessary.😂

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EmergencyGuy · 08/08/2023 16:19

"KEEP THAT NOISE DOWN!" plus dirty looks the following morning....... yes, it happened to me and GF 😮

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Shutuptrevor · 13/08/2023 11:01

overdalexx · 08/08/2023 10:26

quite possibly - a camping memory of mine - more detail available if you insist.

Was someone really shagging with the woman’s head out of the tent??? Cos if so then HELL YES we need that story!

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overdalexx · 14/08/2023 11:29

Shutuptrevor · 13/08/2023 11:01

Was someone really shagging with the woman’s head out of the tent??? Cos if so then HELL YES we need that story!

well since been asked, one bright morning long time ago in small tent round back of a pub near the severn bridge - kind of doggy position - pretty sure door wasn't open when we started and I definitely wouldn't have unzipped it so must have been gf. I do remember being somewhat alarmed. Maybe she wanted some air, maybe I was failing in some way and she fancied a view - hello trees, hello birds. Seem to recall that she came. As I recall there was no one else on the small campsite, or not around.

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TooOldForThisNonsense · 14/08/2023 23:23

Something under the air mattress, I don’t like having a cold arse. I don’t camp anymore but have definitely had tent sex in the past.

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StarlightLady · 15/08/2023 14:19

Reminds me of a much younger me when camping. On completion of our "goodnight ceremony", people in nearby tents clapped. 😬

These days it's a hotel with an en suite.

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chocolateonmyface · 15/08/2023 18:11

I did this in a small tent in the south of France on a hot day, more sweat than sex.

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Singeldaddy · 15/01/2024 21:27

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Wyksi · 15/01/2024 22:53

unless you’re by yourself in a big field, your “neighbours” can hear everything going on and I mean everything

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FleshLiabilities · 16/01/2024 11:55

At the Reading festival 1990.

After having a quickie, I noticed my girlfriend had kept her thick woolen socks on during the deed. I was rather put out and made this clear to her.

She loudly shot back with "well at least I don't wear baggy white piss-stained y-fronts" just as a large group of people walked past the tent, pissing themselves laughing.

In my defence, while said pants were baggy and white, they were neither piss stained nor y- fronts.

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chocolateonmyface · 16/01/2024 17:03

Yep. That happened to me, enthusiasm was higher than pleasure.

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Emptyandsad · 17/01/2024 14:18

Shutuptrevor · 07/08/2023 23:18

“only have woman's head outside tent if campsite near empty”

@overdalexx i have no idea what this means, am i being really thick??

So many questions...

Is it just the woman's head that needs to be inside the tent - or should the man's be inside too?

If her head has to be inside, does that mean the rest of her can be outside? Perhaps the whole of the woman could be inside and almost the whole of the man be outside, making good use of the sliding zip door

And "near empty"! Exactly how empty is "near"? Is "near" being used geographically or numerically?

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Aaron95 · 17/01/2024 18:03

If you have an inflatable matress then be prepared to bounce off it a few times.

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