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Accidental friends with benefits?

3 replies

Brainstorm22 · 03/07/2022 10:00

I've been seeing my partner since early February and we see each other once a week as they don't drive and lives a fair way away.

At the beginning we would go out to restaurants, have drinks and then they would get the last train home. They never wanted to stay over with me

Ever since we started having sex in April it seems like we've become friends with benefits without ever discussing it. Neither of us are looking for a long term relationship as I am separated with a young daughter and they may move away in next while. We also don't discuss how we feel or what's happening in our lives. I told them right from the start that I was not interested in any more kids or marriage or moving in together and they said "ok".

They are the main initiatior of sex and we have sex 3 or 4 times a weekend which I have never done before. The sex is really good and we are both really satisfied.

I just feel like I need to see them more and we need more emotional engagement. I do care for them but we don't have much in common and we are both a bit of a closed book to each other. I don't know if I have more feelings for them or vice versa.

Anyone else found themselves in this situation and any advice beyond "just enjoy the sex".

OP posts:
notlongtoo · 04/07/2022 12:17

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This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Estherpologist · 06/07/2022 07:07

Have you talked to her about this?

bedtimeisthebest · 10/07/2022 13:04

You really need to speak to each other about this. My main FwB did become this by accident too. We were just friends decided to sleep in the same bed, not excepting to have sex, but I woke up in the morning very hard and she just starting sucking me until I came in her mouth and it has been this way ever since.

We have discussed how we term our relationship and she prefers 'mates with benefits' so she can drop the 'with benefits' bit when we meet her mum, as she knows I'm married.

My wife refers to her as my 'girlfriend' and her main FwB as her 'fuck friend'

You mention 'emotional engagement'. Do you want someone to have sex with or do you really want a partner.

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