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Finger up his bum. How?

13 replies

Hopefullyoneday12 · 16/03/2022 23:04

My new casual partner has mentioned this.

I realise it's probably pretty standard but having been in a very sexually boring LTR I am new to this.

When is it 'nice' to do this? During oral, or the main event? And how, I don't really get it. Just find the Hole and press a finger in. For example if he was on top, would I reach it from underneath? Also which finger. And when do I wash it? Straight after, I would think. But does that kill the moment? Also how long to keep the finger in?

And my nails are long. Would I need to have short nails for this.

Could someone please go through the basics of this please. Thanks

OP posts:
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SertralineThrash · 16/03/2022 23:24

One of us usually takes a run up at the very least.

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lonelySam · 17/03/2022 13:01

@Hopefullyoneday12

My new casual partner has mentioned this.

I realise it's probably pretty standard but having been in a very sexually boring LTR I am new to this.

When is it 'nice' to do this? During oral, or the main event? And how, I don't really get it. Just find the Hole and press a finger in. For example if he was on top, would I reach it from underneath? Also which finger. And when do I wash it? Straight after, I would think. But does that kill the moment? Also how long to keep the finger in?

And my nails are long. Would I need to have short nails for this.

Could someone please go through the basics of this please. Thanks

Condom over your finger so that you do not need to wash and won't scratch him.
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neverhappyitseems2345 · 17/03/2022 16:26

Lube the finger, I usually do it toward the end of giving him oral as otherwise I can't get the positioning right. Any finger lol, in & out motions. Can't comment on nail length as mine are short. X

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neverhappyitseems2345 · 17/03/2022 16:36

Also, hand wash straight after. I have intimate wipes on my bedside table that I clean them with immediately...less of a buzz kill....then I go wash them properly

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Fidgety31 · 17/03/2022 17:04

I do it while giving oral and I don’t bother to wash my hands unless I get up and go to the toilet after !

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PinotPony · 17/03/2022 20:54

Cut your nails and / or wear a latex glove. Bit of lube... you can buy anal lube which doesn't dry out as quickly as regular.

Find a position that's comfortable. It's nice to combine with oral but you might prefer to concentrate the first time rather than multitasking! Perhaps have him on his front for a nice massage and work your way down... a cushion under his hips to raise his arse up will help.

Don't just find the hole and push your finger in. Take your time. Use your fingers to stroke around his bum cheeks and perineum. You can put a bit of pressure on his perineum (with fingers or knuckles) for an external prostate massage. Build up to penetration. Move away and then come back to it. A bullet vibrator around his perineum and arse can be useful to get him to relax but for gods sake don't insert it if you want to get it back! Any butt toys should have a flared base.

When you start to insert a finger just use the tip. You don't have to be moving the whole time. Hold it there until he relaxes, it can take a few minutes. Kiss him. Remember to keep checking in with him. Ask if that feels nice. If he's happy, work up to a deeper penetration. Vary the speed of movement and depth. Ask him what feels best.

Wet wipes nearby are a great idea but you're unlikely to get a mucky finger so no need to immediately wipe / wash if it'll kill the mood. Just be mindful where you put your finger after as you won't want to transfer bacteria.

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VeniVidiWeeWee · 17/03/2022 23:19

Or use an anal probe.

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Freddy12 · 18/03/2022 10:14

My wife does this sometimes when giving me a blow job or when playing with olive oil ( great cheap lube) if I am close to cumming it slows thing’s down in a great way I love it usually when I do cum after this it is very strong
Maybe ask how he likes it?
My wife has short nails so no issues for us

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Allthegoodnamesaregoneffs · 18/03/2022 16:17

Get some of these, bit of lube and away you go

105 PCS Latex Finger Covers Finger Tip Rubber Protect Keeping Dressing Dry and Clean, Anti-stati www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B083RTNYF3/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_i_B4M6P28KXWWPCCTCDF4X?psc=1&_encoding=UTF8&tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21

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totallyoutnumbered · 18/03/2022 16:46

We both love this. Men can indeed have a P Spot orgasm independently. My DP says they're way more intense and "whole body". Definitely keep those nails short, specific anal lube lasts longer. The prostate (P spot) can be found on the wall behind the stomach so if you're facing him and "come hither" motion with your finger should feel good. The prostate feels like a walnut and is different to the rest of the flesh in there in sensation. Definitely keep checking in as to how he feels but if think when you hit the spot you'll be able to tell!

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balalake · 18/03/2022 17:09

If you are not comfortable, then no is a complete sentence.

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TheWifesLad · 19/03/2022 06:32

My wife does this quite often and I find it very arousing. We invariably do it when we are in the missionary position and she reaches round (she's just able to do that when I'm deep inside her). We've never used lube, but I do ask her to lick her finger immediately beforehand (not during or after!).
Obviously if you are the man and you are likely to be doing this you should make sure your backside is scrupulously clean. The idea of using a latex glove or condom seems a bit of a passion killer to me.

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Mumofboys109 · 28/03/2022 19:59

I do it while rimming him. But tbh don’t overthink it. Xx

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