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No sex drive - where to get help?

3 replies

Cloud1220 · 02/02/2021 20:57

My lack of sex drive has been causing issues in our relationship for years. I’ve (understandably) driven my DP away through lack of intimacy, but I love him dearly and I want to get us back on track now I’ve now reached a place where I have the confidence to address it.
So, who do I need to see?
GP?
Couples/relationship counselling?
Individual counselling?
Sex therapist?
Is this kind of support available on the NHS or should I be looking privately?
Thanks for any advice!

OP posts:
Buntysbosom · 03/02/2021 07:32

I would say GP first off as things like low iron, thyroid issues, low vitamin D etc can all cause low sex drive.

Estherpologist · 04/02/2021 07:18

GP first, then counselling, whatever the GP says. If it's been a problem for years you could have a long road ahead and help is invaluable.
Find a sex therapist, not just a counsellor. Probably a member of COSRT and one who specifically lists being sex positive on their website.
Use a therapist who will talk to you and your partner separately and together. And get your partner to talk to them too A lot of counsellors won't talk to individual partners if you're seeing her together. The good ones know that if you have stuff to unpack that is relevant to each other, you may not be comfortable discussing that in front of your partner.
IMHO there is hope, because you're prepared to ask the question.Flowers

Cloud1220 · 04/02/2021 21:29

Thanks @Buntysbosom, really useful to know! And @Estherpologist that’s very insightful thank you and good to know what/who to look out for! I do think we need some support with wider relationship but this is one of the root causes of issues we have when they arise!

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