Ds is a hugger and has found someone at school who also loves hugs, not sure if this is a good thing or not.

[elliejjtiny]

Ds5 (year 7) is a sensory seeker who has autism. He also has the emotional development of a toddler. The sencos at both primary and secondary school and I have tried our best to teach him not to hug people at school, personal space etc.

Now he has got to know a girl in year 9 who also has autism and loves hugs as much as he does. He is so happy he has found someone to hug at school. Normally he hugs me many times a day but of course I can't go into school so he can hug me.

I'm not sure if I should just be happy for him that he has found someone to hug at school or concerned that all the teaching him about personal space is now being ignored. He is supervised most of the time at school so I know they won't have the opportunity to do anything more than hugging. I don't know the girl so don't know if she has similar needs to him or has constant supervision or not. I just know her name, that she is in year 9, she has autism and likes hugs.

Maybe try and get to know the girl and her parents. Support the friendship as it seems to offer comfort but both sets of parents need to be involved to ensure both children are comfortable.

Personal space is an issue for people who don't want unsolicited hugs. But if his new friend is happy with hugs then that's not an issue. You aren't undoing the work you've done, they are both benefiting and it's mutual.

The point of personal space it about consent surely. As long as they are both comfortable and no one else is uncomfortable (eg if it seemed too romantic for school) then no problem