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Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Girls wearing skirts at school

73 replies

RedskyAtnight · 01/09/2020 08:09

DD (Y10) has decided this year she wants to wear a skirt to school after having always previously worn trousers.
She had tried her skirt on and was showing me when she said "Oh and I'll need some cycling shorts to wear underneath". I told her she really didn't and I got a hard look and a "yes I do Mum, my school is full of paedos". Established that she actually meant boys at the school and not male members of staff.

DS (Y12) then wandered in, saw DD in a school skirt and asked "Are you wearing shorts under that?". DD said that I was going to get her some and he said "good, there are too many boys at our school who like looking up the girls' skirts".

I've come across the argument for wearing shorts under school skirts before, but it's normally at primary school age and linked to the risk of showing off underwear when doing cartwheels.

Perhaps I am being naive, but I was genuinely shocked that this was happening. Is this widespread teen boy behaviour, or is their school particularly bad?

OP posts:
Lexilooo · 01/09/2020 08:45

The boys stand under the stairs and look up. It doesn't matter how long or short the skirt is, if they are looking up through the gaps in the stairs they can see up skirts.

sashh · 01/09/2020 08:46

How do boys look up a girls skirt that easily from a practical point of view.

Lots of new build schools have those stairs made of metal with holes in, if you look up from underneath you can't not see up a skirt.

Some schools also have floor to ceiling windows which also make it easy to upskirt.

LittleBearPad · 01/09/2020 08:50

@sashh

How do boys look up a girls skirt that easily from a practical point of view.

Lots of new build schools have those stairs made of metal with holes in, if you look up from underneath you can't not see up a skirt.

Some schools also have floor to ceiling windows which also make it easy to upskirt.

Fair enough on the open stairs point. I can’t get my head round the floor to ceiling windows logistically but will try.

I know some teenage boys are little toads but it’s wrong that girls have to adapt their behaviour to manage it. Schools need to take a firmer line on it.

chubbyhotchoc · 01/09/2020 09:37

@GhostTypeEevee doubt the police would be interested unless the parents pushed it. We had four boys jump another on the school bus and knock him unconscious to the point he had to be carried off by the driver and passengers. Police weren't interested despite cctv because the boy himself and his parents didn't want to prosecute.

AppleKatie · 01/09/2020 12:17

What practical school subjects are hampered by school skirts? confused

Drama - children are encouraged to sit on the floor, and lots of physical work is impaired if a girl is concerned about modesty.

I agree with the teach boys not to be abusive pricks thing obviously but while that re-education is going on (and it would take a huge cultural shift) in the short term trousers would help girls now.

SnuggyBuggy · 01/09/2020 12:24

Sounds normal for secondary school sadly. We used to just wear our PE shorts under our skirts. To be fair as an adult I always wear shorts under a skirt.

TulipsAndLilacs · 01/09/2020 12:41

My dds have always worn skirts to their secondary school and say the boys at their school don't look up girls' skirts

JustAnotherPoster00 · 01/09/2020 12:47

Maybe an assembly about how upskirting is an offence?

It isnt unfortunately, the bill was blocked by the Tory MP Christopher Chope

GhostTypeEevee · 01/09/2020 12:57

@JustAnotherPoster00

It became illegal a year after he blocked it

JustAnotherPoster00 · 01/09/2020 12:59

[quote GhostTypeEevee]@JustAnotherPoster00

It became illegal a year after he blocked it [/quote]
Thank god for that

HandfulofDust · 01/09/2020 13:19

Obviously if she feels more comfortable she should have cycling shorts but it's incredibly depressing that it's necessary and I'll be making every effort to make sure my son knows how unacceptable this is when he gets to that age.

dementedpixie · 01/09/2020 13:27

My dd wears a skirt and has never worn shorts underneath. She wears a skater style one rather than the tiny pencil skirts most wear

Mamabem · 01/09/2020 14:00

A lot of chat about girls dressing conservatively as opposed to disciplining boys to ensure a safe environment on this thread. I find that shocking...

Sorry to hear that your girls - and you by extension - are having to deal with this OP.

Rollergirl11 · 01/09/2020 19:28

DD also going in to Year 10. Girls have to wear skirts at her school, trousers are not an option. She has never felt the need to wear shorts under her skirt. I just asked her if there was ever an issue with boys looking up the girls skirts and she said no and that they would have to be extremely short to be able to see anything. DD does roll her skirt along with all the other girls but the school is very strict (catholic) so no doubt they are not as short as other schools.

The terms “nonce” and “paedo” seem to be bandied about an awful lot by teens these days. Apparently if you have a girlfriend/boyfriend even just a year below you it makes you one!

IHaveBrilloHair · 01/09/2020 19:38

Dd wore jeans, sometimes shorts with tights, occasionally a dress, again with tights and DMs or Converse and a t-shirt with a TV/Band logo.
A zipped hoody over the top, v occasionally a coat, but rarely.
The boys wore exactly the same look, without the dress and tights obvs, thought that was allowed.
One of the best state schools in Glasgow, which is non uniform.

Terrace58 · 01/09/2020 19:42

I’ve finally just admitted to my daughter that the average teenage boy is awful. Thankfully many of them will grow out of it and become decent men.

If it helps, I’m wearing a maxi dress at home and have lightweight shorts on underneath, designed specifically to go under skirts. (My favorite brand is Thigh Society). I use them as a substitute for underwear because they are incredibly comfortable and keep thighs from getting sweaty or chafing.

AndreaTwo · 02/09/2020 10:53

Firstly, congratulations to your daughter exercising her right to choose between trousers and a skirt and for recognising the potential modesty issues when wearing a skirt.
I had to wear a skirt at school and would much preferred trousers, especially cycling to school on cold winter mornings.

Secondly, I agree that boys should be taught to respect girls, both by teachers and parents.

unmarkedbythat · 02/09/2020 11:04

God, this depresses me. The responsibility for avoiding sexual harassment should not be placed on victims. Anyone who wants to wear cycling shorts under a skirt, fine, wear whatever makes you happy, but I never felt that it was my behaviour that needed moderating if people were perving. It's too much down the route of "he shouldn't have raped you but what were you expecting going out dressed like that?" for me.

BluebellsGreenbells · 02/09/2020 11:09

How do boys look up a girls skirt that easily from a practical point of view

Girls bend over desks to reach something, or pick something up if the floor, walking upstairs, winds (ours have to wear pleated skirts)

Boys always have and except now they make a thing of it instead of a sneaky peak.

They are worse then when I was at school.

lifeafter50 · 02/09/2020 18:15

It’s one of the many reasons I think skirts shouldn’t be a uniform choice at secondary school.
Completely agree -far better to wear trousers.
At the school I work in girls (and boys!😀) have choice of trousers or skirt and those who wear skirts usually choose to wear cycling shorts underneath.

noblegiraffe · 02/09/2020 18:17

This would explain why so many girls wear thick black tights with their skirts.

Danglingmod · 02/09/2020 20:26

I have never heard of cycling shorts under skirts at secondary because the vast majority of girls who choose to wear skirts also wear tights all year round (and also both my school and all the ones I'm familiar with locally have a knee length skirt and no-one rolls them up. The girls who choose skirts over trousers aren't interested in rolling them up).

Newdaynewname1 · 02/09/2020 20:36

Its very common in loads of environments - workplace, public transport, etc. I always wear shorts under skirts, and i’m an adult.

Ginfordinner · 03/09/2020 08:51

I have never heard of cycling shorts under skirts at secondary because the vast majority of girls who choose to wear skirts also wear tights all year round

In year 10 girls just wear tights with skirts, especially in winter.

Its very common in loads of environments - workplace, public transport, etc. I always wear shorts under skirts, and i’m an adult.

Is it? I know on MN in summer posters often want to avoid chub rub, but I thought that would be the only reason an adult would do this.

NotGenerationAlpha · 03/09/2020 09:01

I thought also it's normal to wear shorts under skirts. In fact I've stopped wearing them because it's so restrictive. I have to occasionally get down on the floor or climb up on tables, and I find it hard to do so modestly that I now just wear trousers to work. (Pre covid ofc)

I also stopped wearing them at home after children because with a skirt I can't climb on children playground equipment, over stiles or into softplay frames easily.

I just find everything easier to wear trousers. But I can see why teenage girls want skirts and wearing shorts underneath is a compromise.