Hurt over little contact

[molifly]

It’s half term where we are this week. I took our two DC ages 1 and 6 away Monday - Friday. Partner was at home working. I left on the Monday, sent a picture of us all on our way and had no response. It got to Tuesday evening and hadn’t had a text to see if we’d got there ok or checking in etc. I rang Tuesday evening and had a 5 minute phone call and then didn’t hear anything again. It got to Thursday and I sent some photos over and got a generic ‘that’s nice’ message and nothing else. AIBU to just feel really hurt and uncared about? If it was the other way around I’d be desperate to speak to DC and DH to hear about their time away.

Honestly, I couldn't get worked up about that.

You were away with the children for a week and he couldn't be bothered about any of you. What a prince

Is he normally a good partner and dad?

Is he usually a poor communicator OP? Some men are rubbish at texting. If not then l'd guess he's either resentful of you all going on a break or else he's very busy. Maybe phone him for a chat instead?

Men are generally crap at stuff like that.

I have more contact than that with my ex when we're away and I thought he was useless.

I send pics of the kids doing things and say what we've been up to, which he responds to. He asks about weather and traffic and what they've been eating. He speaks to them if they want to tell him something they've done. We've been separated for years, I would expect a lot more interest from someone I was in a relationship with.

I think it’s really sad your partner showed no interest in whether you were all having a nice time! When I go away I would always text good morning/what are your plans today? and how was your day?/good night at a minimum.

I'd be pissed off at this. I wouldn't expect hourly check ins but a daily call to chat to us all and good night message feels normal. Is he jealous you're away while he's working maybe? I'm not excusing him - it's just the 'that's nice' comment gives me that vibe

Thanks everyone, perhaps I’m been a bit needy. We were away visiting my family so not something he’d usually be interested in doing however perhaps he was resentful. I hadn’t really thought of it like that.

You are kicking up s fuss over nothing really

Just to clarify, i haven’t kicked up a fuss or even mentioned it to him. I just felt internally a little hurt.

You are not wrong or needy to expect some contact and interest from your partner and father of your children. I don't know why the bar is so low here that a quick daily check in on your own children and life partner is seen as extreme. It's absolutely not.

I speak to my DH daily. It would be very odd for one of us to be away and the other not check it. It would be either one of us initiating it but I would be worried initially and then hurt if I thought I’d been away and he’d not thought to check in at all.

I guess it depends on what’s normal for you guys

This exactly