Tips for getting over relationship ending

[Thiswillpasshopefullysoon]

I’m dealing with a relationship breakup at the moment and finding it hard to get through some days. I’m looking for practical things that have helped others manage, stay steady, or feel a bit more themselves during a tough time. Any tips would be appreciated.

Keeping really busy. I know what helped me was going straight out again and not dwelling on him. I met my husbamd two months after. I was many yeard with my ex. I am married 15 now.

Book things in the diary to look forward to. Could be a solo weekend away, one with friends or even just a day trip or bike ride etc...

Work on making you even better than you are, maybe try something new like the gym or running further, or picking up a new hobby.

Have a good clear out, go through all drawers and cupboards etc

I found going past / into places that had strong memories with ex was good to get that 'out the way' and to feel I didnt need them.

Block ex on all social media and dont be tempted to FB stalk!

Start dating, even just to meet up with people too see how it goes.

So it turns out staying busy is pretty important. I love how positively you’ve both dealt with things. And, it’s no shock now that the sadness showed up yesterday when I had a bit of quiet time.

I am sorry OP. It is always difficult.

Did you live together? If so can you move some of the furniture around, just to make your lounge/bedroom look a little bit different.

Try as much as you can to break the routine that you had. Take a different route to work, shop on Tuesday instead of Friday for e.g., order something different from a completely different take away.

Cry, scream and shout. It is okay. You do not have to be brave and try keep all those emotions in.

Do not sit around with nothing to do right now. Go out and have a walk. Go to the shop and browse around instead of an online delivery. Just be doing something. Maybe even do a few squats. Change your hair, can you colour it or change the style a bit.

These are essentially distraction tactics. Just to distract your mind from your old habits and routines.

It takes time though. And there is no set time for this, so don't set yourself a time and say for eg, I will be over him in 3 months from now. All you are doing now is taking each day at a time.

Keep posting if it helps you. Lots of people here have been where you are now, and come out the other side all okay. You will, but it takes some time and plenty people here will help to distract you x

it might sound silly but it helped me to think about the things my ex didn’t enjoy that I do, and plan to do as many as possible! Eg: eating a type of food that you love but they don’t, a place you always wanted to visit or hobby you fancy trying but they weren’t interested in. Even something small like watching a film you know they’d hate! I found this sort of thing gradually helped me imagine a positive future without them and see it as opportunities opening up for me rather than dwelling on what I’d lost. And it helps keep the diary full too!

it’s a slow process, but be kind to yourself, it’s absolutely ok to prioritise yourself at this time.

Allow yourself some time each day, eg.30 mins to think about what happened, to go through the grieving process etc, then stop. Do not allow yourself to think about it again that day. Take up a new hobby like knitting or crochet or suduko or nail art, anything that needs concentration. You need a distraction and you need to be firm with yourself.
When I went through a big break up many years I spent far too much time thinking about him and what had happened. With hindsight I think I did this because I thought keeping it fresh in my mind would stop me from letting my guard down and it happening again. Could that be what you are doing ?
Whatever has happened, it will always be in your past but one day it will be a long time ago. I really do believe that it is not possible to feel extremes of emotion whether it is the depths of despair or ecstasy. It will get better, I promise.

To add, I meant to say I don't believe it's possible to feel extremes of emotion indefinitely.

Go to the gym or just exercise more, talk to someone knew and give your energy to them

Get busy, put things in your calendar to look forward to, pursue your hobbies , treat yourself if you can afford it to whatever - clothes, trips, a bottle of wine, chocolates, or a good film, whatever makes you feel good. Watch some comedy and have a good laugh. Think about the things your ex did or said that annoyed you (he wasn’t perfect nobody is). See friends and family and get it off your chest. Focus on you and gradually you will think less about him. Join new groups make new friends and go to new places you never went with him. Make new memories. This is how I got over the ex-DH after 20 years.

Agree with the above that - annoyingly - it does take time no matter how much your brain screams at your heart to move on.

Keeping booked and busy IS a good plan but do make space for yourself to acknowledge how you feel and mourn the relationship, that’s okay. Sometimes a glass of wine/Ben and Jerrys and a decent cry can work wonders.

Self-help books, podcasts and that type of thing can be encouraging and also think of something to give yourself some love - throw yourself into your skincare or mindfulness or exercise or refresh your wardrobe etc.

You will get there, be gentle with yourself ❤️‍🩹

I’m not the best one for advice, if you’ve seen my post but I am in a tricky situation of getting over someone

writing everything down in a notebook (journaling) don’t censor yourself, getting it all out on paper helps you to process

Go for a run or walk.

read.. learn about your attachment styles. Attached is a great book and also breakup bootcamp

coach Craig Kenneth on YouTube. A certified therapist gives excellent breakup and relationship advice.