I need a rant and some perspective. My DM has always been difficult and this has not changed with age. Very opinionated and very, very shallow. Honestly, my teen years were dominated by her constant criticism of my looks and how this reflected on our family. My DF is the opposite and has never spoken to me in such way, although I have no idea if he secretly shares some of her opinions.
I recently introduced my BF and whilst she was more subtle than usual she was still being bitchy and made it clear that she didn't really approve. He had a facial birth defect which was corrected at a young age and whilst you can see that there was some corrective work done it is very subtle and he is very handsome. I knew that she'd be difficult and had asked her to be respectful beforehand but that's obviously the best she could do. He noticed and I could tell that he was uncomfortable but he didn't comment on it and just said that she had seemed nice.
She hadn't been nice, and she was on to me afterwards about how I can do better and the usual talk, what if it's genetic, etc etc. I love this man the way he is and I think I have finally reached the point where I am considering freezing contact with her because I don't want her to ruin things. My only worry is my DF who has never behaved like this and who I'd be punishing too through no fault of his own.
Sorry long post, but it helped to write this down and let go of some of my anger. Not even sure what I'm asking for if I'm honest!