Having a sad day. Keep me company?

[Alwayschillyatnight]

I'm sad today and don't want to tell anybody I know.
Im exhausted after a full on week. The kids are with their dad and my plans to go try out a local run club and start building my local social network had to be chinned off.

I miss having someone to do nothing with. I miss lazy weekends cuddles up watching tv. I miss a person feeling like home. I just feel so alone right now, not helped by being completely exhausted. Im an energetic and busy person and I hate being inactive, but I know i need to rest in order not to make myself sick, so I'm sitting around in heaps being beset by emotions I dont know how to get past.

I enjoy my life. Im doing well. I adore my kids. I like myself more than I ever have. I dont want to feel this sad about being single, its pathetic, but I guess its just partnod the healing process. The relationship ended a year ago, but my goodness ive had so much to deal with the past couple of years it's taking a while just to get through all the layers and i guess this is one of the last ones to get to.

Can anyone tell.me something nice, or hopeful, or healing? And i don't mean slagging off what its like to live with a hypothetical man. Actual positive things. Nice things about your life maybe, nice things that have nothing to do with relationships. Tell me what's going well for you.

Glass of wine in the bath with a film on the laptop or reading a book. Weekend team sport as its more sociable. Time to clean and organise the house and come up with new food ideas and creative cooking!

I think you’re allowed to feel how you’re feeling OP, you can sit with it.

I’m a single mum too, I would like a relationship but not really enough to do anything about it. When I left an abusive relationship, I went back into education and got a degree to retrain in a career I’ve always wanted to do. I’m really proud of myself for that.

I’m trying to be kind to myself as the season changes, I miss being in a relationship the most as the nights draw in and it gets colder.

I’m reading more, buying myself flowers every week, lighting candles, having hot baths and just taking it a day at a time. Bake Off and Blue Lights are both back on TV soon, they’ll cheer me up!

Hello, I'm so sorry you are having a sad day. I'm having a sad day too xx My cat sat on my lap earlier which was so lovely, and a friend checked in by text knowing life is hard at the moment which I appreciated, and I'm enjoying watching my DD enjoy an old comedy programme I love, it's nice sharing it with her. I'm trying to take the little wins because I have so many big scary things happening and no one in my corner just for me. I'm having to be everything to everyone and I'm exhausted. Sending solidarity and I hope you feel better soon x

I also know what you mean about liking yourself more than you ever have but still feeling sad. I am fitter than I've ever been, taking care of myself, feeling strong physically and knowing and appreciating my good qualities, but this kind of makes it worse being single with no one to appreciate me but me! I second candles and books and nice tv and leaning into the things you enjoy and making it more intentional.

treat yourself nice meal bubble bath glass of wine i am sure things feel bad at the moment but I am guessing that your children will be back soon.
I know you said your plans were called off but could you do anything else or ring someone for a natter?
sending you a big hug

It's ok to be sad. I miss the kids. But I can watch what I want on TV, which is a bonus. I've done a bit of housework and now watching the rugby with a posh coffee.
Happy just to be with you.

Ive been there.
Allow yourself your feelings for a while. Then, do a small thing that will help you feel better. A cuppa and a chocolate biscuit. A small glass of wine, if you like. Watch a favourite film. Bubble bath. Read the very funny joke thread on here from yesterday.
And remember. This too shall pass. You will get through it. Be kind to yourself. 💐

Thanks all. I appreciate the supprtive words and solidarity.

I had to cancel myself going to running club because I was too tired. Its one of the reasons I'm hesitant about a team sport - my energy and time commitments vary and I don't want to let others down, so running club seemed a good compromise. There's one a little further away tomorrow I'll try and go to if I'm feeling more rested. I really need some local friends. All mine are so damn far away.

Ive eaten dinner at 3pm - cottage pie from the freezer - and im baking two cookies from my roll of raw dough i made last weekend. Fuck vegetables and calorie counting today.

And cheers to all the single mums on here. Even when you enjoy life its a heavy weight to carry, isn't it? I might do a bit of self beautification later. Apparently strictly starts to light and I havent watched it in years, so thats something a single woman can enjoy for a bit without anyone eye rolling, huh?

Also I really really miss sex. Just saying.

A thing of beauty

Hello there.
I'm retired and my husband left me very suddenly a year ago.
At first I was sad and angry but I'm enjoying my life on my own now.

You'll start to feel better as time goes on, I'm sure. Pour yourself some wine and watch a film.

Life is a series of small moments. The smell of the coffee, the bloom of the flowers, the smell of the air when you go out on a walk, the enjoyment you get from reading the Saturday newspapers, a good book, watching something fun on TV, playing with the kids etc. Learn to enjoy these small things and don’t think about the bigger stuff…

A local charity I support has the offer of premises. It would be suitable but we shall have to do more fundraising to make it possible.

I found a yoga class better than more vigorous exercise when I was exhausted and burnt out from work. It's good for clearing and calming your mind also.

Pets can be great company if you are an animal lover.

Getting out in nature can be positive. Maybe see if there's a local walking group in the area if you're looking for company.

I'm a crazy cat lady. Got three of the furry gits. Love them to bits.

My gym does do yoga classes.i need to get back into the habit.

Most of the nature walks/ rambling groups do their walks in the middle of the working day. I suspect they're mostly retirees. Doesn't really gel with a 9-5 full time role.

Ive exchanged some voice notes with a friend which has helped a bit

Snuggle those furry beasts! I have five and they're all very helpful!

I do when i can, but one is very elderly and crabby and the othet two are idiotic teenagers who are often too busy causing chaos to be cuddly. But that's amusing, too.

Been for a run today - first ever group run. Did 7k.

Had a McDs breakfast, stocked up on food (over £100 for me and two kids! Ouch!) And petrol (also ouch) now back home on the sofa until its time to go get the kids from their dad. I was going to go to the sauna at the gym, but I think i might burst into tears there if I do and I'd rather not make a bit of myself in public like that.

Hi OP we sound very similar (I’m about to be single whole other thread in relationships). My advise is really obvious I’m afraid but just try to do something manageable and but makes you feel good.

I don’t have many single friends so am here if you want to chat ☺️

Well done on the run. I’m also a runner and a crazy cat lady. Used to have three, lost two of them recently (old age) now left with one fat tabby with an attitude problem.

More solidarity from me. Miss my kids dreadfully - they are with their dad this weekend. I have a reasonably good life and would not dream of having him back but I too miss sex. And kisses and cuddles. Any human contact really but yes, sex is really missed at the moment.

I hope you are taking ViT D and\iron levels have been checked for the tiredness.

I hope you do something very nice for yourself today. Tomorrow is the start of a new week. Onwards and upwards 💐

You're clearly an excellent baker, so there's that! I can empathise with you, not so much about the being alone as I am married, but about the feeling ill and drained a lot of the time: I have endometriosis and sometimes (like today!) it really, really gets me down. All I can suggest is resting, reading or watching something good, and a lovely glass of wine.