Struggling with anxiety after discovering partner’s long-term affair and pregnancy

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I need some guidance and support please. I am really struggling with anxiety attacks and my mental health . I just found out my boyfriend of 6 years got someone pregnant 2 years into our relationship and she aborted the baby. I spoke to the woman and she told me they had been seeing eachother as a “situation-ship” for almost 3 years. I also just lost my grandad who I was really close to 3 months ago so I have been dealing with grief now this.
Im becoming very overwhelmed

Hope you’re ok OP.

How did it come to light 4 years down the line?
Have you confronted him about it? Does he admit everything?

Easy for me to say but it would certainly be relationship ending for me. Two years of sustained and consistent cheating can’t be argued away as a “mistake” and suggests a very deceptive character.

So he was cheating on your for multiple years? And having unprotected sex with her?

That sounds very traumatic. I hope you've dumped him.
Maybe you can get some kind of counselling to help you deal with the grief and anxiety?
If that's not a realistic proposition, (money/NHS availability) then you'll have to try to look after yourself....little treats, lots of exercise, and a plan about how you would like your life to look going forwards.
You say "boyfriend" so probalby not a live-in partner?

Honestly ; it’s been really difficult I started having panic attacks which I haven’t had in 15 years because I am in disbelief. I have dumped him because the woman provided me with loads of evidence of photos together etc and he still stood there denying the whole thing she even showed me text messages of discussion between them regarding the termination and he is flat out saying it’s not true. Very angry towards me for approaching the woman and shared I was the one who opened the Pandora’s box so I now need to deal with the burden.

we didn’t live together

Yep hence the pregnancy

I found a card which showed there was a cross over so I found her name through his social media and it was her. She confirmed everything saying they dated till 2023 we been together 2020.
i did confront him with the photos and receipts and he basically said it was all a lie she’s a bitter ex etc despite the fact her photos had time stamps. He also blamed me for contacting her and said well now go deal with the pain you caused upon urself

How absolutely awful for you OP.
What a piece of low life. And the fact he can't even be honest about what happened even now shows that lying and deceit are who he is.
Have you had your sexual health checked out OP? If he was having unprotected sex with her, and who knows who else actually, you need to look after your own welfare.
So sorry this has happened to you.

What a prince.
Keep reminding yourself you’re well rid of someone with that type of morals from your life (re not just the affair itself but the lying/insulting your intelligence and then blaming you for the outcome).
Keep your dignity, you won’t regret it.

What an absolute . I’m so sorry OP. Unfortunately I had an on and off relationship with someone who also cheated repeatedly and was impossible to pin down, would never give me a straight answer. Then drew me back in being all sad and sorry and then again it happens….

the one thing that really helped me the final time I actually broke it off for good was having the evidence finally (much less than you have!!) and him lying to my face so blatantly. I realised that if I hadn’t known the truth for sure, I could have believed him, he was that good of a liar. It meant I could never trust him again. He later went on to marry the OW within 6 months of our breakup, turns out she was by then pregnant - this is the woman who he claimed to me was only a friend 🙄

talk to friends and family in real life so you have support, call in sick to work for the week (hideous gastro bug??), get yourself booked for an STI screen, and give yourself time to grieve while also reminding yourself that this guy is a liar, a cheat and you are better off without him long term. Easier said than done I know. But honestly after my couple of long term relationship breakups (all def for the best!) within a couple of weeks max I felt much better. You will be okay I promise x

That’s an awful shock and he is just a big fat liar with his pants on fire.

Do you work? Do you have an Employee assistance program at work? You can get free counselling and it’s confidential. I hope you have support in real life.

WELL DONE FOR DUMPING HIM