I’ve been online dating for a while now and I’m really struggling to connect with anyone (although have made a really good friend). I am thinking I’m probably happier on my own. I just don’t understand the mentality of some of these men. I had two phone calls last night.
The first was slightly more promising because he did at least ask me a few questions. Unfortunately, he then proceeded to mansplain something to me that I had literally put on my profile saying I did. There was also a lot of information about him, unsurprisingly. Quite a lot about exes. Wasn’t for me.
The second one was something else. I actually put the phone down and pretended I’d lost the signal because I was so bored of listening to him talk about himself. At one point he decided to explain to me what ‘New Romantic’ meant. I’m 55. I’m quite heavily into music. It says so on my profile. I would have thought that even someone who wasn’t particularly interested in music might have heard of the New Romantics. The best bit was that he then struggled to explain what they were and eventually told me to google it.
Do these men ever listen to themselves? Do they not notice that they’re having a one way conversation? Isn’t there supposed to be a loneliness epidemic among older men? Don’t they ever wonder why they can’t seem to get any interest, let alone form a relationship. Surely if every woman you meet is apparently not interested at some point you might wonder whether you are the common denominator!
A previous phone call about a week ago, I timed it and a chap talked for 15 mins solid before I said anything and it didn’t improve much after that. I was hearing all about his cousin’s friend’s niece’s partner’s dog etc.etc. Other than that, he seemed quite nice, but I was kind of losing the will to live by the end. None of them appeared to be nervous either so I wouldn’t put it down to that.
What do you actually do when a man starts monologuing on a first call/date? It is the first time I have put the phone down, but my patience is getting a bit thin. Is there a way to say it without saying - I am actually bored shitless mate!? Perhaps it might save the next person at least.