Infidelity Recovery specialist needed

[PositiveGoals]

Especially does a specialist exist who can referee an overhaul of phone secrecy? our counselling is such a help already and I was hoping a specialist could guide how to rebuild trust when DH needs so much help to open up transparency and it would feel more effective and better if an outside helped guide

I think that would be a divorce lawyer. You’ll recover from the infidelity much more effectively with one of those.

May a man like this never find me.

op what makes this twat so special out of the 7 billion out there that you’d go to all this effort to stay with him? He sounds an absolute bellend. Go live your life without this hassle

Visit survivinginfidelity.com and post a less cryptic version of how you arrived in your current situation.

The phrase “referee an overhaul of phone secrecy” is so at odds with what any decent couples therapist would see as their job, I think you are looking for something that doesn’t exist.

Your soul mate shouldnt need a raft of experts to teach them how to be honest.

Oh OP. Don’t do this to yourself. Just leave that bag of shit in the dust.

Don’t waste what remains of your precious life trying to reform someone who has to be coached into being a decent human. It never lasts.

If he wants you to reconcile with him, he needs to do the work to rebuild your trust, not you. He needs to offer it up, not be forced into it by a counsellor. That will just cause (more) resentment on both sides. If he needs a counsellor, he needs to find the counsellor. People only change if they want to change. He doesn't want to.

Take it from someone who has been where you are and out the other side.

An important lesson I learnt through failed reconciliation was don't over offer as the betrayed partner. Otherwise, you'll sink more and more and become less and less valuable to the strayed. They will also blame you, if it's not something they geniunely wanted to do.

If your partner is refusing, despite knowing he's violated your trust by cheating on you, to play nice in the aftermath, and if you - despite choosing of your own free will to stay with him - are going to be performing 'reviews' into phone use complicated enough they need a specialist professional to referee, then I would say your marriage is probably past saving.