Would I be unreasonable to move away after our divorce?

[Helpneeded6]

Ex husband had an affair three years ago. We divorced. He now lives with the women and her three children. My children and I are healing and trying very hard to get for a place of happiness but I am finding it very hard. We live in a small town. Everyone knows about our marriage despite me being a very private person and although our children are young still, I worry they will be affected by gossip when they are older. I want to move away. I feel very stuck here. Ex husband sees children EOW. I have a professional job where feasibly I could find work easily in another city or location. I feel stuck.

How far away are you talking? He can legally stop you, btw.

Ah op that sounds tough. Do you have family support elsewhere that you could move closer to? Just be careful what you tell him as he may try and prevent you from moving out of the area.

Moving could be an hour away to a city or further a different county. This town is never where I wanted to raise children, my ex and I had already had that discussion prior to our separation. But I of course feel conflicted now.

No one is going to be talking about you in a few years. They likely aren't talking about you now. Life moves on and so will you. Moving to another nearby town might be helpful but any farther and you create an issue for you, the kids, and your ex.

You can’t just move the children to another country, you’re not the only one with parental responsibility for them and cannot make decisions like that.

It states county not country.

Move no further than an hour away and you’ll be able to coparent fine. Consider if the kids would need to move schools or not and how your coparenting arrangements would work with a drive between.

I moved 45 mins away and it works perfectly. Kids stayed at their school and we coparent 50/50

Likely still stands if an hour to another city is the closer move option though.

You can't necessarily do that either - he can apply for a prohibited steps order to stop her taking the kids away.

@beaglescurleduplikebagels and@Midnightmoonface
I wasn’t saying it didn’t stand, I was just highlighting the OP hadn't said country.

No one is going to be gossiping about your marriage to your children when they are older.
The separation was 3 years ago, it's old news to everyone else, even in a small town.

I know a few people who have done this. I think if it’s no further than about an hour, and you have a credible reason for the move such as job promotion or moving nearer family/support, he won’t be able to block it.

where are your other family/friends? Don’t move away from your support network but if that isn’t the case - yes I’d move.

It's more the stuff of kids seeing their friends & parties/events & their hobbies etc is so much easier when you are local.

I see so many posts on here of the kids spending hours trekking to the other parent at wk ends & miss out on stuff they'd want to be doing & it must just be so crap for them as well as hours in/on a car/bus/train.