How do I raise my partner viewing explicit images online?

[Amor88]

My and my fiance have been together for 14 years we have a 6 year old together a mortgage and a life together, the past few years we have been struggling he’s had bouts of depression I struggle with anxiety and since having our child I have struggled with my weight and self image so our s..x life has not been great its been few and far between, but iv recently found out he’s been looking at pictures online of other makes women and now I just feel disgusted about myself, I have never and could never look at another naked man all the time im with my partner no matter how bad things got, I know it’s not cheating but I feel betrayed how do I even approach this with him, he doesn’t seem happy at all with me and when I try to talk to him about that he says I’m bringing silly and that he loves me can anyone give me any advice on how I bring this up, (I found out as he left his Google account long in on my iPad so his search history saved) everytime I thought he was in the bath or on the toilet he was looking up naked photos of other women.

now I just feel disgusted about myself
Well you shouldn't feel disgusted with yourself OP. He is the one who should be disgusted with himself because he is disrespecting you.

In my view it is cheating. If he is your fiance then he has committed himself to you and a future together. Your lives are entwined with the commitment to your child and financial obligations. So looking at naked women is a betrayal.

By telling you that you are silly when you try and talk to him about your relationship he is denying you your feelings. You need to tell him you know he is looking at other women and tell him how this makes you feel. He needs to know how unhappy you are in the relationship atm. And tbh if he refuses to talk about what you can both do to improve the relationship then better to end it rather than let him destroy your self esteem.

If your sex life has gone down the pan, it's hardly surprising that he's looking for other outlets. Looking at images online is far from the worst one.

Similarly, if your boundary is "neither of us watch porn", that's not unreasonable either.

Just have an open conversation with him. It's not difficult.

Yeah I have this and my husband did this too and I just came out with it one day when he came from work and told him I’d seen his open pages & search history on his tablet with links to various big boob sites (that’s his thing the bigger the better)
He’s 59 and we’ve been married 37 years so as his excuse he says as I hardly give him anything he has to get it from somewhere! Plus he said he’d never ever actually do anything with anyone else so it’s not as if it’s cheating it’s just looking.
My married older son does it too as I’ve heard them both talking about it when he visits us and he’s early 30’s with a 5 yr old and shows his dad pictures of girls on his phone. 🤦🏻‍♀️