Sad but don’t think this friendship has a future?

[howtogonc]

I’ve had a friend for 18ish months. When we met, she was going through a stressful period in her life and I was very happy to be moral support as much as I could be. However she’s been out of that situation for a while, yet every single time we meet up, the conversation is always about her. Twice I’ve tried to bring up my life, what I’m going through and she couldn’t be less interested. Each time that’s happened I’ve felt what’s the point, I’d have been better off not speaking about my life. It all feels very one sided, I’ve given her a lot of emotional support but she doesn’t actually seemed to be interested in me at all really. Should I just not bother anymore?

I would try to be more pointed. Not just 'bring up life '. More 'can I talk to you and get advice because I'm struggling and my brain is going to explode.
Then see what the reaction is. Lots of people don't quite get it the first time but when it's spelled out can come through amazingly supportive.

It doesn’t sound like a healthy friendship really.

I think using each other as an emotional crutch really only works with long term friendships.

18 months is hardly any time at all.

You both seem to have skipped the fun bit where you’re friends ‘just because’.

@ABOOOI haven’t used her as one, but I do feel quite a bit like an unpaid (and unqualified) therapist. We never really had the fun part because when I met her she was going through a lot and I was trying to be supportive as best as I could.

It sounds like you met a need she had. Sometimes that can go on to turn into a reciprocal relationship but that's not happened here. I wouldn't blame you for moving on from this.

Sorry to say that she may have latched onto you to provide an emotional crutch. Some people like to be the centre of the universe and or drama llama. You’ve now realised how one-sided the friendship is, so it’s absolutely fine to withdraw.

I’m guessing she hasn’t got many other friends, for whatever reason. Maybe that’s why you became friends, to support her in her time of need when you heard she was struggling. However, like her other friends, you’ve realised Huw one sided the friendship is.