Bizarre or stupid break up stories...?

[Alwayschillyatnight]

Inspired by a thread i just read where the OP joked about her relationship basically ending because she was accused of singing a song she wasn't singing and then not apologising about it I thoight I'd add my own, recent, stupid break up and ask if anyone else has a bizarre break up story to make me (and possibly the Billie Jean non-singer) feel better about our break ups.

So, my story was that I got dumped for “not acting like a partner” because I took time to reply to a message.

Embarrassingly, I had actually sent the last message, and he then waited 30 hours before reappearing to accuse me of shutting him out.

This followed him misunderstanding some plans, not asking me about them, changing his plans to accommodate his own misunderstanding, and then apparently expecting me to chase him while he sulked about doing so.

So the lesson is clear: unilateral silence, unilateral decision-making and unilateral relationship termination are all perfectly healthy 'partnership' type behaviours, provided one has the correct penis.

At university I was in halls and woke up to my boyfriend - who I had been with since sixth form and was at another university in London - on my doorstep at 9am. Weird! I let him in and asked if everything was ok - he said it was - we went into the kitchen and I made him a cup of tea, then I had to go to the loo. As I did the walked past the front door and the postie was just popping the mail through. There was a letter to me from him... dumping me! He'd written it on Friday and this was Monday and it was delivered first class! He'd obviously tried to intercept it! I took it into the kitchen and said: "Not sure why you are here really?" He apologised loads, said he made a rash decision and that he didn't mean it. I said: "Too late, it's in writing - I'd like you to leave please." (This was in the days before mobile phones BTW).

I was working three shifts at my local pub in between lectures that week and he was in the pub for every one of my shifts - asking me to go back to him. I said no - who does that? Cowardly custard. Then I did a big shift on the Saturday as it was the rugby and the agreement I had with the landlord/my boss was that I would work that day but I wouldn't work during the game as I wanted to watch it.

Ex spent 80 minutes crying at the table I was sitting at watching the game telling me he was sorry and that he was stupid, etc. My landlord came across and said: "Arlanymor, he's made a mistake,I will pay you for the whole shift if you take him home now and sort it out. He's putting off the customers!" So we went to a different pub and he spent two hours explaining and apologising.

I went out with him again and for another four years... until I broke up with him, got engaged to someone else and he moved to Boston (the American one!) because he hated seeing me in town. We're Facebook friends these days and he's married with two kids - he's also Facebook friends with my mum! 😂

So the break up that never was - well, not for four years! You're right, that is a good weird break up story. What a twerp.

I was half hour finishing having a bath. He had turned up early to my house so I told him to wait downstairs for me and wouldn't be long. When I arrived downstairs he shouted at me for being 'late'. I gave him one chance (wouldn't do that nowadays) and he did the same thing about something else and then flounced out of the house to leave. Unfortunately the gate was locked so he had to come back and ask to be let out.

Although it was me that then finished it (from a distance by text), he didn't protest and was a bit shitty about it. About 6 months later he got back in touch to try and reunite. At the time of knowing him he had quite a serious illness, no major symptoms - and wrote to tell me that he had the all clear. He had obviously told himself this was the reason I broke up with him.

It is amazing the things they get pissy about. I let so much slide and now i wish I hadn't!

I was waiting for a date to pick me up. He was over an hour late because ‘he was playing on the swings and lost track of time.’

We were 22.

Part of me wanted to embrace his inner childlike joy but most of me realised he really was a twat.

I get that.

The thing i hate is when the things you loved just disappear and you never see it again. Probably better if you find them twattish at the outset.

He said "I was pleasantly surprised I found you attractive, I normally go for much slimmer women".

I said I was done.

There were many issues including him being allergic to work and bad in bed, but that was the catalyst.

Negging. Classy.

This may not count, as not really an ex. I got dumped after 5 dates. Apparently I hadn’t replied for over 14 hours to a text after our 5th date. I was asleep for 8 hrs and working in a busy clinic in a hospital where I had patchy phone reception and could only text at lunch. We had already agreed a 6th date by text the night before when I got home.

apparently my lack of communication showed I didn’t care and was a gold digger. But we split the bill on each date. I had to leave the department to get phone reception, which was a ball ache with a 30 mins lunch. Plus he knew that and I only texted him in the evenings. He was furious with me.

I thankfully had a lucky escape

I dumped someone when I woke up and he said he had stayed awake all night watching me sleep. Creeped me out big time!!! Shudders 😬

That seems like a totally valid reason to break up!

He had fabulous long hair. I later discovered that it covered a huge swastika tattoo covering his skull.

I repeat my former post...
😦

We were broken up for a week before I relented!

My bad!