Me (36) and my husband (47) have been together 5 years, married for 2 and have 2 young children. We were due to move into a new house in a few weeks, but I’m seriously thinking of leaving.
For nearly 5 years he’s repeatedly accused me of cheating despite never having any evidence. I’ve shown him my phone, blocked my ex, reassured him constantly, but it never stops. He questions me over normal things like going to the shops, collecting parcels, smoking outside or being on my phone after he’s gone to bed.
During arguments he’s got angry and aggressive, got in my face, grabbed my arm and smashed household items. On one occasion a glass smashed and I was cut.
The other night he accused me of having an affair because I stayed up late online shopping instead of coming to bed. When I tried to walk away, he shouted, followed me, blocked the doorway, refused to move and insulted my family. Afterwards he blamed it on his anxiety.
I did leave him once when our eldest was young because of his behaviour, but he promised to change so I went back. Now we’re here again.
He’s asking for marriage counselling and says we owe it to our children. Part of me thinks I should give it 3-6 months, but another part wonders if I’m just delaying the inevitable. He’s also threatened to “go nuclear” in court over the children if we separate.
I’m not saying I’m perfect. I’ve said hurtful things in arguments too, but usually after being accused or shouted at.
WWYD? Would you move into the new house and try counselling, or leave now? As we’re married but I’m not on the mortgage yet, do I have any rights. im so drained and angry right now.