How can a man get help to leave an abusive relationship?

[YourNavyDreamer]

Does anyone know how for a man to escape domestic abuse please? I’ve finally realised I need to leave and when I look online for support, men’s charities are only open certain times (I do find that quite unfair as women’s charities are open 24:7) so I struggle with ringing them when there open she belittles me everyday, I no longer see friends or family, she literally does nothing I cook I clean while she spends all our money on drink, i go without all the time:( I feel so trapped
will the council help men? I never see positive stories about it I just need to leave now :(

You could leave and file for divorce. You don't provide enough information about finances and children. If you have an income then you are already half way there.

Can you pretend you have a doctors appointment or need a food shop and call the helplines then? Otherwise go and speak to your GP and ask for their help. Which is exactly what women do.

Good luck in finding a way out.

I'd call on family and friends first. They will probably be relieved to see you, and be fully aware of your partner's behaviour. People aren't blind, especially if they love you, and will help you.

Register with the council housing department, and explain what is happening. Talk to any of the domestic abuse help lines.

The main issue is housing which is why a couple of months living with family will buy you the space and time you need to sort out a new bank account and get your head above water.

I hope it works out.

Just leave. Women need help to leave domestically abusive situations 24/7 because they’re usually in fear for their life. It doesn’t sound like you are so (assuming this is a real situation) then just leave. But whining about the lack of equality for men in domestic abuse charities when women are dying daily at the hands of male domestic abusers and men are not isn’t going to endear you to women on Mumsnet!

Ring a friend or family member and ask to stay with them whilst you get your options sorted . There is no reason why you need to live like that .

whining ! Is that really necessary. He has asked for advice and help. Not scorn from you.

You can always get involved in raising money and activism for increased men's services when you're able.

That's what women did and do. Support services have been campaigned for and support is always needed to keep them going.

You can always go to the police if you're at risk and you can ask the council for help with housing etc.

Are children involved?

Women often need help because they are financially unable to leave and physically smaller and vulnerable to rape, and are generally the main caregivers to children. I’m not being obtuse but presuming you have a job or your own benefits, just leave. It sounds like you’re trying to wrangle a higher place on the council housing list. A single person male or female comes pretty low on their priorities because people with children rightly need priority. Do you have children you need to house?

And why do you need to put "assuming this is real"?? Would you have said that to a woman op?

You could Google and phone one of the charities now. You could also email them for info anytime.

No I would have instantly believed a female victim of DV having been one. Appreciate my tone was harsh but the tone of the post didn’t ring true to me. As a DV survivor, when I needed help (I didn’t get any btw and had to help myself) I wouldn’t have had the time or thought to pause to complain about the disparity in equality between men and women which for women is an actual thing!
If in genuine need and on a predominantly female focussed forum asking women for help I think it’s unlikely you would have a dig at women!