Bored?

[Imboreddd]

Am I using the wrong word?
I’m a single mum with my children full-time. My life is basically work, cooking, cleaning, childcare and keeping on top of everything. I’m constantly busy, but if I’m honest, I find a lot of it quite mundane and repetitive and dare I say boring.
When I say I’m bored people seem to get annoyed and tell me they could never be bored because they’re so busy and theres so much to do. But surely you can be both busy and bored? Just because I’m always doing something doesn’t mean I find it stimulating or enjoyable, every day feels the same.
I think what I really miss is excitement, spontaneity and having something to look forward to that’s just for me. Most days feel very similar and I’m stuck in a cycle of responsibilities.
Can you be busy but still bored, or is there a better word for what I’m describing? I’ve had enough people say to me that they are never bored because they are always busy so I'm clearly using the wrong word!

Busy and bored can absolutely exist at the same time. Looks more like you are mentally drained by routine. Doing the same stuff every day can make anyone feel that way.

Absolutely. You need something just for you.

Study? Engrossing hobby? I got very involved in my workplace trade union which worked out really well for me.

You're just trapped in the routines of single mum life, any kind of routine can make you feel 'bored' i think you need to work out what you would enjoy doing away from the children, or with them, that would break that routine and make your life feel more interesting, whether that's going out on your own with friends or work colleagues, going somewhere on your own, for a hobby or the gym, or taking the kids for days out. Might even just be changing your daily routine to involve different activities like watching movies with the kids at home, not sure, only you know what you enjoy doing and how you would facilitate it from a financial or childcare/babysitter perspective. Good luck.

Thanks all, no childcare so not possible to do things without the kids. We do days out but it’s stressful rather than enjoyable for me anyway 😓

That is probably your underlying problem, i think every parent needs 'ME' time, i would look into ways to change that, if you can't get childcare could you book them into after school clubs or other clubs outside of school where you could grab an hour to yourself. Also you could try to have your 'ME' time whilst they are at school, i know it wouldn't be the same as going out for an evening with friends but maybe just hooking up for a coffee with friends, or getting your hair done instead of spending your life doing chores might make a bit of difference.

They are in different schools so after school clubs aren’t on the same days or at the same time they also like different things so dont go to the same clubs etc i was more just wondering about the term “bored” seems to rub people up the wrong way!

I don't think it really matters what you call it, ultimately it just means something is missing in your life or everyday just feels the same. I'm not sure if you're looking for ideas on how to break your routine or if you just want confirmation that 'Bored' is the correct term. I think it's possible to be busy and bored at the same time, i'm mega busy with work and home life but kinda bored with life in general, so i'm a believer 😆

just confirmation really! Im going to find another word though 🫣

The youngsters use the term 'meh' i suppose 'Fed Up' also works...

I guess it came up because I was talking about dating again and some people said not to and “enjoy your peace” I said peace is nice but it’s boring!! They then said they were never bored because they were always so busy yes I’m busy too but life is boring (I’m not saying you need a man to have fun but I do miss the excitement of getting to know someone/ dating etc, I miss exciting and spontaneity, peace is fine but it can be boring)

I had a suspicion that we would get to that eventually, so basically you are missing the excitement that dating brings, i guess your situation would make that slightly more difficult given that you struggle to find time for yourself but it's still possible, just be careful, i wouldn't want to be back on the dating scene these days...seems to all be Tinder and false motives but there will probably be decent ones out there if you can find them. Use your spare time while the kids are at school to do your research and maybe in time you'll get that buzz back.

I am working whilst they are at school and tbh I don’t think many men are around during the day anyway!

Ahh work, yeah that will also get in way…maybe try chatting to some people online first and see how it goes, you might have to tread a lot of shit before you find anyone half decent though 😯

I did actually consider joining online dating just to chat but a few people said that would be wrong 😂

I’ve come to the conclusion I am using the wrong word and people associate bored with having nothing to do. I think I’m going to start using the word dull instead!

I don’t see why that would be a problem, you would be in control of who you spoke to and whether you decided to meet them or not.

Monotonous is a better word.