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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

His actions and words don’t align

18 replies

MelaninMimii · 23/02/2026 23:15

My boyfriend thinks it’s okay for him to compliment his female friend about her body.he has made a comment about her boobs and he lied about them going to a hotel. Am I being stupid to believe him that it’s just general friendship nothing is going on? He makes comments on every lady on his Instagram,Facebook and he doesn’t see any problem about it,I confronted him about it and told him how I feel about it but nothing is changing.

OP posts:
Yennefer17 · 23/02/2026 23:18

You need a new boyfriend

NoodlePuddle · 23/02/2026 23:23

For many reasons you need to get rid of him asap.

Olderandwiserpossibly · 23/02/2026 23:24

He won't change OP. That's who he is.

TheOchreJoker · 23/02/2026 23:27

He's obviously no good. at best he doesn't care about your feelings, at worst you're one of many woman he's stringing along.

There's zero reason to settle for this nonsense, go find a proper boyfriend.

onelumporthree · 24/02/2026 00:47

He has no respect for you, or for other women. Dump him.

smallsilvercloud · 24/02/2026 02:31

He’s making a fool of you, dump him

Willsmer · 24/02/2026 05:48

He will not change. Move on. He is not worth it.

TheThingOnTheIce · 24/02/2026 06:18

Oh come on op

category12 · 24/02/2026 06:34

Show him by action that you're not going to put up with it. Dump the guy.

Broommie · 24/02/2026 06:38

He has no respect for you. Have some respect for yourself and finish with him. No joy will ever come from this man.

TwistedWonder · 24/02/2026 07:48

Why are you wasting your life on this wanker? Don’t be a pick me girl. He’s a lying cheat - find your self respect and dump him.

SparklyGlitterballs · 24/02/2026 07:49

He sees women as objects and has zero respect. Dump him and find someone better OP.

moderate · 24/02/2026 08:50

MelaninMimii · 23/02/2026 23:15

My boyfriend thinks it’s okay for him to compliment his female friend about her body.he has made a comment about her boobs and he lied about them going to a hotel. Am I being stupid to believe him that it’s just general friendship nothing is going on? He makes comments on every lady on his Instagram,Facebook and he doesn’t see any problem about it,I confronted him about it and told him how I feel about it but nothing is changing.

His actions and words align with you leaving him.

Lmnop22 · 24/02/2026 08:54

He lied about being in a hotel with a girl who he has made sexual comments about and finds attractive?

Why didn’t you leave the second you discovered this?!

NameChangeElaine · 24/02/2026 09:04

Never try to change a man (that’s a fools errand), exchange him for another man instead; it’ll save you a lot of time and misery, believe me.

ERthree · 24/02/2026 09:20

You know he is lying so why are you still with him ?

TwistedWonder · 24/02/2026 09:54

His words and actions match exactly - he lies with his words and actions.

Raise your bar OP

exhaustDAD · 24/02/2026 09:57

That is just disrespectful to you. Whether he has something else going on with other women or not. There's a line, and he doesn't mind crossing it. I am not really one who tends to join in on the "leave him" crowds, but no respectful guy would do this to you. So in your own best interest, maybe have your actions align with his words and wish him well...

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