What the hell am I doing?!

[OnceMoreIntoTheBreachDearFriends]

For context, live in a medium sized town but it might as well be a village given that everyone always seems to know everyone else's business. Family with three brothers live around the corner (from where I grew up, where I live now, and the school we all went to). Can forget about the oldest in terms of this post.

Youngest brother was a year above me at school and absolutely the school heart throb - captain of the football team, drop-dead gorgeous etc (there's always one isn't there). He was absolutely not interested in a little mouse like me except for a one off snog at the swings after a few swigs of cider. Saw him and his (now ex) wife a few times over the years as we have mutual friends so at weddings, etc.

Middle brother - five years older than me - I had a short but very intense relationship with him that ended almost five years ago. A lot of it was in lockdown which meant we were thrown together more and although we did family things with his parents we never saw the younger brother as they absolutely hated each other. Turns out my ex was a massive serial cheat (so much for social distancing) who broke my heart and who I now completely despise.

Couple of years ago younger brother (now single) tried to chat me up, which I found both bewildering and hilarious. His ex wife and I used to still chat occasionally and she was as baffled as me - also her stories about him were not good, but I guess there's two sides to every acrimonious split.

Fast forward to now and he's been messaging me again. I played along and was polite and somehow ended up agreeing to meet him for coffee on Friday coming. Since then I'm finding he's actually growing on me a little, but surely the whole situation is a complete fuck up and bizarre beyond belief?! I know I shouldn't but then again I never do anything spontaneous 😂I should also probably say I've only been single for two months and although I'd be open to dating and fun times I have no intention of a relationship... he's not really getting that though just thinks we'll see what happens

WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING

You are fresh out of a relationship which is a tough time even if it was your decision. Someone who you consider has status (school heart throb) is showing you attention which makes your ego feel good, and has the bonus of potentially pissing off your ex/ his brother who you despise.

These are not good reasons to go on a date and are likely hurtful to yourself and others. Have you asked yourself whether he is also playing a game to get back at his brother?

It is understandable however especially if he is still gorgeous and I would probably make a similar bad decision.

The thing is I don't think he's aged particularly well - and it's definitely him doing all the chasing this time! On the other hand I most definitely have had a 'glow up' since being the skinny little mousy one at school!

The relationship was only a short one and pretty drama filled (was with a long-term friend who is now not in my life at all anymore) - to be honest I don't have room in my life for a serious relationship and I've never really just dated and had fun!

Dating brothers would give me the ick. And not just me - my ex SIL started dating her ex’s half brother and everyone thought it really weird (like aren’t there enough men around without double dipping in the same family)?
Also the way I first read your post I thought they were YOUR brothers!