I wanted to find out if he was single but hardly spoke

[Cyanapples]

I met this guy a couple of years ago through work. He was newly single and I was in a relationship. He showed interest in me and I told him I was with someone and he backed down. We still saw each other through work roughly every month and kept it professional but I felt we sort of developed a bit of a friendship mostly discussing our lives:family, health, him current dating issues. We haven’t exchanged phone numbers despite him shyly hinting at it a couple of times in the beginning. I do have access to his number but I would not use it due to GDPR.

My relationship ended in the meantime but I did not advertise it at work for personal reasons. I saw this guy last week for a couple of days and was going to try and find out where he was at. Hard as I couldn’t ask outright as always in a professional setting. We ended up hardly talking to each other, partly due to me being busy. He had a few attempts to speak to me but the timing wasn’t right.

I am just feeling a bit deflated and maybe thinking I should drop the whole thing really. It’s probably hormones too giving me a last kick as I am mid forties.

OP - “faint heart never won fair lady” and other platitudes, truisms, cliches,
all self explanatory

Don’t back off, if he is an honest man he will tell you his position as far as his relationship goes. Good luck.

Please keep trying and keep updating so I can live vicariously through you. What have you got to lose? People you have a connection with don't come along that often.

Thank you for the encouragement. He usually tells me if he is dating/messaging someone. At some point was asking me if I had any friends he could meet. He backed right off when I said yes, one I have in mind is meeting me for lunch and you could meet her too.

I never had to ask and I wouldn’t even know how to do it without showing direct interest in him. I am not one to play mind games and am quite straightforward but don’t want to feel stupid either if he is not available. Plus I haven’t dated in a couple of decades so it’s all new territory.
Arghhh😁

Why don't you email him saying nice to see you at event, let's go for a catch up lunch soon? Or dinner after work?
Then you can scope out then where he's at and if he's single move onto cocktails etc

Yes agree, with the above. Message him and say something like good to see at the work event but it was a shame we didn't get to have a catch up. Would you be interested in a meeting for drink/coffee?

Yep, I assume you can message him through work channels. Just ask if he’d like to catch up for a coffee and take your cue from his response.

Just tell him your relationship is over in a casual updating someone with news way. Take it from there.

I see some posters replied recently.
To give an update I did not say anything in the end and I am glad; about a couple of months later he caught me on my own and told me he had just started seeing someone. I do hope it works out for him.
I, in the meantime, had some serious health issues that I did not disclose, and I reduced a bit the workload and will not be seeing him in the next few months anyway. I actually hadn’t thought of him in a long time until I saw these replies popping up.
Sorry it’s not the update everyone was hoping for.