Why does he do this

[YourAquaViper]

I broke up with my ex 6months ago now but he’s been living with me since the break up , up until now. He’s been wanting me back he says ever since and I have stuck with my boundaries and had told him no.

I was speaking to another male which use to be a friend of mine but didn’t speak too him in a way that I liked him romantically only in a friend way , he was lovely but no. Ive slept with my ex who is living with me alot of times in which I did tell this other male just incase he wanted things to go further and not to waste his time and had told him I’m not going to speak to him anymore as it isn’t fair too lead anybody on if he took it in that way anyways and I’m still not completely 100% over my ex.

However also my ex is speaking too another female in which they speak to eachother a lot but he hasn’t told her anything about us , the only thing he has done is warned her about me saying I may end up messaging her from what I heard and also keeps wanting me back still as In saying do you still want me too move out? Do you want to work on things? But why ask me all this if you are speaking too somebody else ? I don’t understand why some people do this ?

He's keeping you around as a back up option and you are letting him. He is using you. He clearly isn't serious about a future or wanting to work on things else he wouldn't be talking to another female full stop. Cut your losses, kick him out and find yourself.

If you have split up why are you still living together and so involved in each others lives? The the best thing would be to separate so you can decide if you want to work on things or not. This current situation sounds confusing and messy.

Why are you housing and having sex with this man, and discussing each others private business? Just boot him out of your property and enjoy life.

He’s been saying he’s going to move out for ages but hasn’t. He’s been trying too find a private rented accommodation but there all too expensive for him and we’ve both got kids together.
Currently he’s been waiting for his stepdads friend to come back off holiday so he could stay with him for bit which he came back off holiday yesterday and that’s when yesterday he’s asked me if I still want him too go and asking me again if I want to work on things with him .. he’s still here he hasn’t gone anywhere. He kept asking me yesterday how is my new man , I said I haven’t got one and I already told you the guy I spoke too I cut him off because it wasn’t fair, im not completely interested in him and was better I cut him off earlier than later and told him the truth. So I asked him after so how’s your woman then and he goes she’s ok she’s sitting infront of me in which I said too him I’m not your woman though? lol … Yes it’s very confusing and messy right now and upsetting really I don’t know

Excuses excuses OP. of course he could have found something if he really wanted to. He's just using you and the whole situation sounds toxic. Have you both got children living with you too? If so this set up must be very confusing for them. Now his Stepdad's friend is back from holiday you need to get him gone ASAP. He's just using you atm and your boundaries are obviously rock bottom of you are letting him get away with living with you, making promises he fails to keep and entertaining other women.